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I was just at a fast food joint and as I waited for my food I became aware that the song on the tinny PA system was… a Christmas song… about Jesus. Like… I don’t know the song but it was all about how this time of the year is when we celebrate Christmas, because of Jesus. it was very much a direct Non-Holiday song with all the emphasis on Jesus. His name occurred repeatedly. And it was… listen, that’s weird. It’s real weird.
I decided just now, as I have the song tinkling half-forgotten in my head, that I’m going to become a pagan, but not like, a Wiccan type of pagan. No.
No, I’m going to worship Mithras. I don’t really know anything about Mithras except that he was worshipped largely in mystery cults so there’s a lot we don’t know, right? (I apologize in advance if there’s a large active Mithraic population I just don’t know about; I don’t mean to erase you, but my education thusfar has presented it as very much a mysterious relic of a bygone era.) (I promise, I’ll Google it after this, I just thought it’s funnier if I do this knowing as little as possible.)
What little I know seems appealing, right? He was a young hot dude who wrestled a bull, right? And like, nobody could talk about it? That last bit is very appealing.
But the thing that made me think of it is that “Mithras” scans identically to “Jesus” in songs and such, and I could just do Mithras carols, except then I’d have to kill every listener to keep the secrets, right? but let’s just. We’ll get to that later.
In the meantime, time for Mithrasmas.
I was just at a fast food joint and as I waited for my food I became aware that the song on the tinny PA system was… a Christmas song… about Jesus. Like… I don’t know the song but it was all about how this time of the year is when we celebrate Christmas, because of Jesus. it was very much a direct Non-Holiday song with all the emphasis on Jesus. His name occurred repeatedly. And it was… listen, that’s weird. It’s real weird.
I decided just now, as I have the song tinkling half-forgotten in my head, that I’m going to become a pagan, but not like, a Wiccan type of pagan. No.
No, I’m going to worship Mithras. I don’t really know anything about Mithras except that he was worshipped largely in mystery cults so there’s a lot we don’t know, right? (I apologize in advance if there’s a large active Mithraic population I just don’t know about; I don’t mean to erase you, but my education thusfar has presented it as very much a mysterious relic of a bygone era.) (I promise, I’ll Google it after this, I just thought it’s funnier if I do this knowing as little as possible.)
What little I know seems appealing, right? He was a young hot dude who wrestled a bull, right? And like, nobody could talk about it? That last bit is very appealing.
But the thing that made me think of it is that “Mithras” scans identically to “Jesus” in songs and such, and I could just do Mithras carols, except then I’d have to kill every listener to keep the secrets, right? but let’s just. We’ll get to that later.
In the meantime, time for Mithrasmas.
