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dragonlady7i am most exceedingly sleepy now.
i go to bed soon.
i've spent the evening packing me and dave up for the trek home. his dad's body will be returned tomorrow, much sooner than they'd initially said. the funeral will probably be on saturday, though. they need to get everyone together and prepared.
dave figures he won't get anything done here, but if he goes home at least he'll be not doing anything while being there in case his mom needs him. i'm coming too, as i'll be doing the driving tomorrow, most likely. So we'll be there tomorrow mid-day, possibly, and we'll be able to do whatever his mom needs us to.
dave seems ok but subdued. he spent most of the afternoon asleep, and for that matter, most of the morning. which i suppose means he's depressed. he always sleeps a lot. what else is there for him to do, now?
i have plans for things to do to keep busy while in buffalo. we brought laundry, which is less selfish than it seems-- we have it so there's something for us to do, to be busy and useful and not underfoot.
the other project is something i did for grandma k.-- we went through the family albums and found representative or exceptional photographs of her, about her, by her, of things that marked important instances in her life. Her wedding photograph; the photographs of each of her children's First Communions; a photograph with her parents as a child; a photograph of her and her sister outside her house; a photograph with Grandpa as a young couple, etc. etc. etc. And of course her college graduation photograph-- she was very proud of that degree. Not many women had them.
So if we go through the boxes and boxes of photographs in Dave's mom's and aunt's basements, and find good photographs, evocative photographs, funny photographs, representative photograps-- maybe we can organize them somehow and put a kind of storyline framework onto Dave's father's life. And if we scan them in (his parents have a scanner) and perhaps utilize Dave's sister's professional graphic design skills (she's good. She's damn good), we could maybe make something really nice out of it.
Sigh.
Anyhow. I've got Dave's belongings thrown in a suitcase; I've thrown the dirty dishes into the dishwasher and pushed "start", I've got the kitchen and bathroom cleaned so it won't stink when we get back. I've got the laundry gathered, I've got accessories stacked in accessible places, and I'm going to go get in bed and hold Dave and make sure he's asleep. He's been sleeping all day. I don't know if he'll sleep tonight. But I'll try to keep him feeling safe, at least. It helped me so much when he held me after my grandmother died. I can only try to help him the same way.
i go to bed soon.
i've spent the evening packing me and dave up for the trek home. his dad's body will be returned tomorrow, much sooner than they'd initially said. the funeral will probably be on saturday, though. they need to get everyone together and prepared.
dave figures he won't get anything done here, but if he goes home at least he'll be not doing anything while being there in case his mom needs him. i'm coming too, as i'll be doing the driving tomorrow, most likely. So we'll be there tomorrow mid-day, possibly, and we'll be able to do whatever his mom needs us to.
dave seems ok but subdued. he spent most of the afternoon asleep, and for that matter, most of the morning. which i suppose means he's depressed. he always sleeps a lot. what else is there for him to do, now?
i have plans for things to do to keep busy while in buffalo. we brought laundry, which is less selfish than it seems-- we have it so there's something for us to do, to be busy and useful and not underfoot.
the other project is something i did for grandma k.-- we went through the family albums and found representative or exceptional photographs of her, about her, by her, of things that marked important instances in her life. Her wedding photograph; the photographs of each of her children's First Communions; a photograph with her parents as a child; a photograph of her and her sister outside her house; a photograph with Grandpa as a young couple, etc. etc. etc. And of course her college graduation photograph-- she was very proud of that degree. Not many women had them.
So if we go through the boxes and boxes of photographs in Dave's mom's and aunt's basements, and find good photographs, evocative photographs, funny photographs, representative photograps-- maybe we can organize them somehow and put a kind of storyline framework onto Dave's father's life. And if we scan them in (his parents have a scanner) and perhaps utilize Dave's sister's professional graphic design skills (she's good. She's damn good), we could maybe make something really nice out of it.
Sigh.
Anyhow. I've got Dave's belongings thrown in a suitcase; I've thrown the dirty dishes into the dishwasher and pushed "start", I've got the kitchen and bathroom cleaned so it won't stink when we get back. I've got the laundry gathered, I've got accessories stacked in accessible places, and I'm going to go get in bed and hold Dave and make sure he's asleep. He's been sleeping all day. I don't know if he'll sleep tonight. But I'll try to keep him feeling safe, at least. It helped me so much when he held me after my grandmother died. I can only try to help him the same way.
