deputychairman replied to your photo “Worst at

[dragonlady7]

via http://ift.tt/2bnhpzr:deputychairman replied to your photo “Worst at selfies: can’t see my crazy eyebrow hair I was trying to show…”

I beg to differ you are clearly the BEST at selfies

no no, the eyebrow hair is really truly magnificent and I totally failed to capture it. It was meant to be the star of that selfie, and I totally failed.

I feel like I can’t pluck it, I’m so pale and I’m genetically fated to wind up one of those middle-aged ladies (which is not so distant now) with no eyebrows, so any eyebrow hair I have I must hang onto, but this one hair is like, two inches long. it’s unreal. It’s bright white and sticks straight out and is enormous. I can’t get a photo of it no matter what I do. Sometimes I wonder if I’m the only person who can see it. That can’t be true. 

We used to make fun of my dad for his crazy eyebrow hairs but I’m realizing now that uh it’s not actually sex-specific, it’s just that the women of my family have historically taken care of them instead of letting them go magnificently free as the men do. Until we go bald in the eyebrows, apparently. SEE WHERE THAT GETS YOU, LADIES.

I’m torn about the moustache hairs that are starting to really show up in earnest– I mean, strike a blow against normative whatever, but also, I don’t really like them– but the eyebrow hair, I can’t remove it because it’ll only hasten the day when I go bald there. My poor mother has never worn makeup, but for most of my conscious years she has had to draw eyebrows on every day that she wants to have them, and for a woman who never learned to apply makeup, that’s been a sort of unwelcome task. She does an all right job, but it’s not optimal. I’d like to stave that off. So I gotta let this eyebrow hair fly its freak flag so I don’t scare its sisters off. 

Comments

[krait]

Maybe I'm missing something, but why not just trim it to the right length? I understand not wanting to pluck it, lest it trigger the Great Eyebrow Hair Mutiny, but I can't figure out any reason not to cut it down to size so it will match the rest of its brethren (in length if not in colour, anyway).

[dragonlady7]

BAH TOO SENSIBLE
I am superstitiously afraid that if I trim it I will somehow Discourage It and precipitate the loss of all my eyebrow hairs.

Also it has two sisters in the other eyebrow, two hairs which are slightly less magnificent each but are definitely Getting Ambitious.

Nobody trims their eyebrows, do they? How would you avoid stabbing yourself with the scissors?

I'm just all-- terrible at this.

I've noticed my dude has some Really Crazy eyebrow hairs but he thinks they're keen so he won't do anything about them. He's not exactly uh. metrosexual. I had to teach him about taking your socks off before sex. He owns six pairs of the same pants. He shaves twice a year. Not an exemplar of personal grooming. (At least he's clean.) (He self-described his fashion aesthetic as "an unmade bed".)

[krait]

How would you avoid stabbing yourself with the scissors?

I... would... cut with the scissors parallel to my face, and not toward? Or else just use nail clippers. (Or use kid scissors, with blunt tips. Or specially made face-hair-trimming scissors from a beauty supply store? That sounds like a thing that might exist, anyway.)

I am not too far off from your dude when it comes to grooming; I own makeup but wear it about five times a year, and I stopped shaving my legs about three years ago because I decided it was stupid. (For practicality's sake, I shave under my arms, and out of a combination of vanity and comfort, I also shave my toe tops & finger tops.) My aesthetic is probably best described as, "Upright, functioning, and washed" - I don't do "primped" or "polished" or "made up" beyond the occasional fancy shirt.