dragonlady7

via https://ift.tt/3B98lao

bunjywunjy https://bunjywunjy.tumblr.com/post/187211243896/pentecost-these-arent-my-cats-but-they-could :

pentecost https://pentecost.tumblr.com/post/175357723351:

these aren’t my cats

but they could be

FROG WIVES FROG WIVES

ok this doesn’t make sense sans context but. lemme try. you had to be there. no. see. so.

i get a lot of spam texts lately. Yesterday’s were all… on a weird theme. (They often are.) They started off telling me, wildly ungramatically, that I could get my wife moist in minutes, which– like– since when do I have a wife, for starters? I complained on one of my Discords, and ruminated that well I mean if I HAD a wife, I wouldn’t want her to be dessicated, that’s not– and of course one of that server’s sparkling wits immediately said

FROG WIFE

so that’s where I live now.

I then got another text saying I could get my spouse dripping, and like– WHERE is my dripping spouse! Where are you keeping her!!! GIVE HER TO ME

anyway then I saw this post and was like THERE ARE THE FROG WIVES THE SPAM TEXTS PROMISED ME and.

anyway get on my level, spammers, stop promising to get me hard and instead deliver unto me my promised frog wife and I’ll totally let you steal my identity. Which, I think, is what you’re actually after?

oh no the one that just arrived as I was writing this knows my government name, I do not enjoy that. Nope no nuh uh!

(GIVE ME MY FROG WIFE) (Your picture was not posted)