Bob & Chicken
Jan. 29th, 2021 08:27 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dragonlady7via https://ift.tt/39ymK5r
last night a friend was streaming herself using her spinning wheel on Twitch. It was super chill, she’s got a second camera that watches her sleeping giant dog at the same time so it’s an immersive experience. She uses an auto-captioning app, which is great because sometimes I can’t turn the sound up so I can’t hear what’s going on and I still tune in because I can see but it’s nice to know what the chat’s about. (Also invaluable if you missed something a second ago.) But her auto-captioning app makes a lot of hilarious mistakes. Firstly, she’s prone to saying the word “Jeez”, because that’s just a thing in her dialect (which let’s be fair here is pretty adjacent to mine, it’s not like I’m mocking her here, I do it too), and occasionally whips out the whole phrase which is “Jeez Louise”, of course. And the captions would invariably translate that as “Cheese Louise”. So we theorized what sort of dish a Cheese Louise would be. A casserole, probably– I’ll gladly take suggestions.
Anyway, so the concept came up of Bobbin Chicken. As you’re filling the bobbin on your spinning wheel (the thing in the middle of the spindly bit, which collects all your spun yarn/thread/whatever), and you’re eyeing how much fiber you have left to spin, and you decide you can keep going just a little longer, juuuuust a littttle longer before you stop to wind everything off your bobbin– especially with antique spinning wheels, you often don’t have a spare, so you really do have to disassemble the thing and deal with what you’ve made, reel it off onto storage bobbins or a niddy-noddy or something– and it’s a whole production you’ve got to go through before you can resume what you were doing.
But if you can just squeeze a bit more on, you can– well eventually the bobbin stops turning, and you’ve lost bobbin chicken and have to go through the whole rigamarole and then come back and then there’s just like a pathetic tiny amount left to go onto your bobbin to finish the job.
Anyway the autocaptions called it Bob And Chicken, and so another person in the chat was like WHO IS BOB and we were like RUN FROM THE CHICKEN, BOB and so on. Very entertaining.
[in which i am a creep, bonus weird-ass selfie at the end]
But eventually Bob lost and the fiber had to be wound off, and there was some discussion of whether the streamer should turn the camera to watch the unwinding, and she said maybe the camera would just wind up showing nothing but feet. And I, thinking to be funny, was like yaas feet pics and then I meant to follow up immediately with kidding! or something, but Twitch was like
no, you have commented too many times, you cannot send any more comments. please wait.
so my gross creepy thing about feet just like. hung out there in the chat, and i was dying of mortification because like probably everyone knew I was joking but I did not actually specify that I was joking? oh god. OHH god.
Anyway.
in a moment Twitch let me specify that I had been joking, just in case you were in suspense.
Listen if I’m watching your stream about something else entirely just so I can creepily creep on something I’m illicitly sexually into I would at least fucking subscribe, all right? Jeez.
(Or, as the captions say, Cheese.)
Anyhow. That was a whole thing, and in fact she wouldn’t even have been close on bobbin chicken, the project almost filled a whole second bobbin.
“Well,” she said, “this yarn is pretty poofy, but–” and then she paused to untangle a thing. The captions obligingly supplied THIS ONE IS PRETTY POOPY BUTT. 😂
Well, so that was fun, since there was no hockey. (OH my gosh the NWHL situation is distressing! one of the teams in the bubble had a positive corona test! the team had to go home! they’ve already played teams who’ve played everyone else! this is so tense. I don’t know man. Fuckin’ 2021.)
Anyway.
To round out the entry, I was then talking on Discord with various people about our coronavirus hairstyles. And I explained, as I do, that my coronavirus hairstyle has been the hairstyle I’ve had since junior high which is that I don’t cut it, so I don’t miss hairdressers. I’ve got really thin textureless hair that would look shitty in any kind of short style unless I spent forever daily on it, so instead I just grow it out and braid it up and clip the braid up during the day and take the braid down to sleep and then I only have to brush it every three or four days and maybe wash it once a week, and that’s that? I get that not everybody could live like that but I can so I do. So anyway.
Someone posted a photo of some incredible butt-length hair, and I was like, man, that’s way longer than mine, I’m so jealous (mine, however long it is, is definitely terminal-length, since I’ve been doing only minimal maintenance trims for literally a decade by now), but it was enough to get me off my ass to go take my hair down and brush it, which it was way overdue for, and then take a photo over my shoulder, and– oh.
pardon the filthy mirror and those are light brown pajama pants I’m not bareassed there, but yeah! My hair is kinda long, it turns out! And those ends aren’t bad for me cutting them by like a quarter inch at a time in the sink under my arm using my best judgement and the feyeselftrim method from livejournal back in the Day. Not too shabby at all!
Anyhow the other person who posted their hair was like listen i thought about getting an onlyfans for this after i posted a hair tutorial video and got Some Comments but anyway I only bring that up because if you’re going to be creepy about my hair then tip me LOL.
(Yes, creepiness was apparently the thematic throughline of my evening as I attempt to digest it down for the purposes of writing a post, LOL.) (Your picture was not posted)
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Date: 2021-01-29 03:42 pm (UTC)also wow your hair! so long!
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Date: 2021-01-29 11:51 pm (UTC)(That and hands. Some people are so into hands and I'm like they're... those sure are body parts! *sweats nervously* Humans like those!)
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Date: 2021-02-01 04:03 pm (UTC)body parts! we all have them! Weird!
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Date: 2021-01-29 03:43 pm (UTC)aieeee I had missed the NHWL situation (due to dayjob eating all my life during the week) but yes, that is kind of scary. Oh no.
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Date: 2021-01-29 11:51 pm (UTC)*shakes fist* New jerseeeeeyyyy
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Date: 2021-01-29 05:22 pm (UTC)mine is nowhere as long as yours, but does hit my mid-back. and now you've reminded me that I should probably get out the scissors and take off an inch or two to even things out
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Date: 2021-01-29 11:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-01-30 01:51 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-01-30 12:06 pm (UTC)I don't know what people expect that I have to do but. Like, you think I have to hair-dryer this? And like, I don't know, use a curling iron? On what? How long do you really think it takes to do a braid??
I wish I knew how to do like, French braids and things, that'd be cool, but I don't, so I don't do them, so I don't take very long on my hair, LOL.
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Date: 2021-01-30 06:03 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-01-30 12:07 pm (UTC)I love that hairdressers can exist and make a living like that, sure, but I have no, like. Interest. Whatsoever. In going there.