hey so tw grief
Dec. 21st, 2020 07:27 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dragonlady7via https://ift.tt/2KF3ysy
My dad died unexpectedly last night– he was 76 and in pretty good health but he sometimes had these fits of nausea, and it looks like he had one of those last night while Mom was asleep and he must’ve fainted and then choked. She wakes up at 5am every day, and did so today, but that was too late.
So I don’t know how that’s really gonna hit me yet and I just wanted to like. IDK. Write it down, in case I do something messy or dumb or– well, I don’t know.
I’m still in isolation so I could go home for the funeral. I don’t know about my sister’s kids. Probably.
I’m so fucking glad we did the dumb thing at Thanksgiving.
Here he is, the day after Thanksgiving, cutting my dude’s hair for him.
Hm, and I was just watching with great sympathy as a childhood family who were friends lost their patriarch, an older man who’d had several strokes, and extravagantly mourned him in beautiful ways, and I was so full of pity. And here I am.
Well, Middle-Little has the pistol license so we don’t have to have the firearms confiscated, and everything else can be sorted out at leisure. Mom is the last of her family and has buried the rest of them, she knows what to do.
We know what to do. We just don’t want to. We weren’t done yet. But he wasn’t a man who lived with many regrets; he left many things undone, but only because the days were so short. He and Mom did a ton of estate planning last year.
I don’t know what the grandkids will do. He’d just spent a week teaching the oldest grandson to weld, and bought him a welder for Christmas, and arranged for various projects going forward; I don’t know what that boy will do. But Farmkid, every week of her life she’s spent a day with him, and I don’t know what she’ll do.
Better than me; I never knew either of my grandfathers, because both my grandmothers were widowed in their fifties or sixties.
Well, I don’t know, is what it is. I was getting ready for work and picked up my phone and there was a voicemail from 6am from my sister who always sleeps in, and i thought, “that’s something bad,” and I was right. (Your picture was not posted)
no subject
Date: 2020-12-21 01:32 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-12-21 03:09 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-12-21 03:28 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-12-21 03:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-12-21 04:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-12-21 04:10 pm (UTC)Oh no! I am so sorry for your loss.
no subject
Date: 2020-12-21 04:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-12-21 04:38 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-12-21 06:27 pm (UTC)If you need a space to vent/process/whatever, my door is open. <3
no subject
Date: 2020-12-21 06:54 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-12-22 01:39 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-12-22 04:32 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-12-22 06:18 am (UTC)