dragonlady7

summers, so, when i say visceral, anyway, yes!, someday when more coherent i'd love to nerd out about animal fats, but, currently i am not capable, for the record chickens carry a lot of fat around the gizzard, the more you know, i will Stop Now

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some-stars https://some-stars.tumblr.com/post/636353287133773824/thinking-about-exactly-what-kind-of-mysterious :

some-stars https://some-stars.tumblr.com/post/636351136460423168/thinking-about-exactly-what-kind-of-mysterious :

thinking about exactly what kind of Mysterious Oils witcher characters would use as lube, and the fact that AFAIK animal fats were much more widely used for cooking than vegetable oils in the areas on which the witcher is based, and thinking about my own polish jewish heritage, and ending up with: schmaltz as lube. just stick some chicken fat up there, why not

bomberqueen17 https://tmblr.co/mEi4sKUjTkzs4ila4vEdnuA

i mean for fictional purposes tho super go for it. i can say firsthand that lard makes a decent moisturizer but i have not tried it as lube. hm why am i willing to put it on my hands but not my uhh area? now i have to think about this.

i mean, to be clear, 1.) i’m not going to write this 2.) using food products as vaginal lube is a VERY bad idea. i do not know the medical consensus on anal but it can’t be that bad since people used tallow and whatnot throughout history. mostly i’m just really amused by the idea of schmaltz as lube because it is perhaps the unsexiest of all the cooking fats.

HA no I was not encouraging you to use it either in real life!!!!! no no. do not put foodstuffs on your bits. probably yeah it’d be fine in the butt but i also do not want to try that.

but like. Fictional Story Lube is always hilarious. I am always, always amused by fictional lube choices.

I had wondered if my personal perception of schmaltz was perhaps a distorted perspective by having had far too much like uhhhh visceral experience with chickens and their uhhhhh schmaltz, but I personally am. uhh. not into it. (listen there’s a smell and it takes like days to go away, so.) anyway i am reassured that nobody thinks schmaltz is sexy. and thus that i get the joke.

sorry, lol, i’ve worked a bunch of hours and am about to finally go to bed so i am not at my wittiest, hence actually transcribing all the uhhhs as I try to figure out what to say.