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dragonlady7weddings in fic, i fucking hate the concept of weddings, i am such a bitter crone, i should crawl back in my hole now
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tidy-tidings https://tidy-tidings.tumblr.com/post/183480969565/marriage-is-good-and-weddings-are-great-but-i-hate :
missouri-nationalist http://missouri-nationalist.tumblr.com/post/182624445984:
Marriage is good and weddings are great but I hate modern wedding culture. You don’t need to bankrupt yourself to have a nice wedding. Stop supporting the wedding industry, stop buying outrageously priced engagement rings, stop spending 10k on a dress you’ll only ever wear once.
Coming from a professional event planner - weddings are egregiously expensive because companies openly raise prices at the word “wedding.”
Pro Tip - Never drop the word wedding while planning if you don’t need to. Most things can be for “an event you’re planning.” This obviously doesn’t include things like the venue, DJ (who needs specific wedding songs), and the wedding dress company if you’re going that route versus just buying a dress.
For my wedding I got “discounted” cupcakes, flowers, decor, bridesmaids dresses, groomsman attire, and invitations. I did this by either searching for things that aren’t marketed for weddings or not telling the companies I was working with it was for a wedding. Because honestly, most of the time they don’t need to know why you’re ordering.
These companies target people planning their weddings and markup everything the second “wedding” is said. And it’s said often because people assume the services change exponentially for weddings. They absolutely do not.
The best example are the cupcakes I had for my wedding. I used a designer cupcake store in town instead of spending $1000 on a wedding cake. If you place a large order of cupcakes with a cake tree for display - it costs about $150 for 100 (which is what I did). When you order their “wedding” package - the price raised to a $700 base for 100 cupcakes. The only other perk includes a “tasting.” Forget that. Our tasting was buying a few cupcakes in flavors we thought we’d like and picked three. It cost maybe $20.
What these companies do is scummy and targets people who don’t have information about the event industry.
I will yell it from the rooftops until people realize there’s a better way.
just be aware, the reason places raise their rates for weddings
is because of all the cultural hype around weddings
and how people are now conditioned to be fucking insane about weddings
I work with photographers, I’ve shot weddings as a photographer, it is one hundred thousand times worse and higher-stress than any single other kind of event you can photograph, and believe me people are always shitty to photographers but weddings? fucking bonkers
I also do flowers. Mostly I do boring cheap-n-cheerful posies and bouquets to sell at the farmer’s market but we’ve done some weddings and oh my god no. That is so high-stress*.* Never even had a bad experience at one of those but we now only do DIY buckets– make yr own flower arrangements, here’s some buckets full of flowers and a handout of tips on how to make it nice, have at it and return our buckets if you remember to, thanks, bye. Not getting any closer than that!
If you are not telling the service that you’re having a wedding, then don’t act like it’s a wedding, don’t make four fucktillion custom substitutions, don’t demand all kinds of extra shit (it can’t be BLUE it has to be CERULEAN! I don’t want CRAB it has to be LOBSTER. The tablecloths have to be IRONED. I need ROSES not CARNATIONS), don’t be a fucking bridezilla. (Worse, don’t be a momzilla-of-the-bride, or whatever horrible relative who needs to impose their expectations and their vision on an event that’s not about them in any fucking way. Oh my god.)
So yeah, if you can be chill, have a chill wedding.
If you can’t be chill then those places have that markup for a fucking reason and they have earned every goddamned penny of it. If the words MY SPECIAL DAYYYYYY ever come out of your fucking mouth then you had BETTER be paying that fucking wedding surcharge.
Don’t be like this. My sister had a “family reunion” in a white dress and got very reasonable rates from the catering place, and acted perfectly normal to them, and it worked out fine.
Don’t order the standard package and then freak out when it doesn’t look like what you saw on a TV show once.
Am I a bitter old hag whose withered hand nobody’s ever taken in marriage? Sure. I’m also not in fucking debt over a party.
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Date: 2020-09-06 01:25 am (UTC)Just walking through a craft store should teach people this. Plain ribbon in any colour under the rainbow: $3 a spool. Packets of glitter in multicolour or single-colour: $2. Cake toppers with "Happy Birthday" on them: $5. Meanwhile, in the 'wedding' aisle: $10 white ribbon, $6 white-n-gold glitter, $20 cake toppers.
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Date: 2020-09-06 03:06 am (UTC)Thanks for the inside scoop since I never intend to have a wedding or be involved with the wedding industry. Although, this does explain the time I was providing therapy services to this DJ at a rehab hospital, but he was literally being called at the hospital by a soon-to-be bride demanding why he wasn't going to be providing the service, a substitute was not acceptable, how dare he break the DJ contract, etc.
My cousin's friend is a freelance photographer who seems to do a lot of wedding photos, and with this in mind, now I'm wondering how she manages to tolerate it.
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Date: 2020-09-07 01:29 pm (UTC)and yeah i believe that about the bride hassling the DJ
people are nuts.