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dragonlady7via https://ift.tt/37tJC2f
what-if-dolphins-had-legs:
the-memedaddy:
Meirl
The monster in my closet: raswwwwhggggraaww
Me: GRAWWWWHHSGAGHJOOIHOOOOWWWWGGOOOLLLYUUUUUUSSAAGHJJIIOO
the monster: okay Jesus I’m sorry
[image description: a text caption that reads “If you hear weird noises in the night, simply make weirder noises to assert dominance.”]
I’ve actually done this, though. Like, out in the woods in the yurt, when that thing– we called it a chupacabras but I think we decided eventually that it was a fox– was circling around and growl-huff-barking at me, I got tired of it and went from yelling “FUCK OFF” to just making the most horrifying noises I could manage, as loud as I could. And later, when something was screaming and shrieking in the streambed, I just started screaming and shrieking right back. (I’m like… 80% sure it was raccoons?)
I don’t actually know if it worked but that became my go-to. Because if it was some kind of maniac or eldritch terror or whatever, then maybe it’d think twice and go bug the alcoholic in the semi-illegal trailer down in the big ravine instead of me. And if it was just a fox, well then, it’s not like a fox is gonna call, like, the woods cops on me or something.
what-if-dolphins-had-legs:
the-memedaddy:
Meirl
The monster in my closet: raswwwwhggggraaww
Me: GRAWWWWHHSGAGHJOOIHOOOOWWWWGGOOOLLLYUUUUUUSSAAGHJJIIOO
the monster: okay Jesus I’m sorry
[image description: a text caption that reads “If you hear weird noises in the night, simply make weirder noises to assert dominance.”]
I’ve actually done this, though. Like, out in the woods in the yurt, when that thing– we called it a chupacabras but I think we decided eventually that it was a fox– was circling around and growl-huff-barking at me, I got tired of it and went from yelling “FUCK OFF” to just making the most horrifying noises I could manage, as loud as I could. And later, when something was screaming and shrieking in the streambed, I just started screaming and shrieking right back. (I’m like… 80% sure it was raccoons?)
I don’t actually know if it worked but that became my go-to. Because if it was some kind of maniac or eldritch terror or whatever, then maybe it’d think twice and go bug the alcoholic in the semi-illegal trailer down in the big ravine instead of me. And if it was just a fox, well then, it’s not like a fox is gonna call, like, the woods cops on me or something.
