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dragonlady7via https://ift.tt/2LkvBtU
I am reluctantly confronting the fact that some of my physical ailments, which are nebulous and highly-conditional (did I sleep funny? did i wear the wrong shoes? did i stand barefoot too long?) would probably be helped by me doing, like, any exercise of any kind in an organized fashion, instead of just sitting like a lump in a bad office chair for a week at a time in buffalo interspersed with running around like a lunatic for twelve hours a day and then sleeping on a weirdly-tilted mattress for a whole week at the farm. so like.
sigh. i guess i’ll do some situps.
this is day three and i have sore muscles from. basic situps and like. some leg lifts. 101 shit. A lunge or two. Mostly lying around waving my legs in the air because I don’t want to put weight on my stupid fucking sore foot.
listen the last time i tried to work out it was during roller derby and my overall condition was so high that i could ride an exercise bike for an hour and barely sweat on the highest resistance, and it was just so goddamn unrewarding because it was hours of work for basically no result, on top of the hours i was already spending at practice doing literal fucking torture. I wasn’t leaving myself time for any other hobbies and I got real sick of it, and so when I hurt myself I was like “fuck this shit” and entirely stopped all physical exercise apart from the shit I do to live my actual life. (Which is. Like. Reasonably active? Sometimes? Not very. Here’s a weird fact: I lost weight. Yes, the fitness industry is lying to you. Anyway, I’ve stopped counting, and you’re not going to catch me doing shit for a Trimmer Whatever. My shit is my shit and it’s shaped like my shit and I have a lot of experience at it being that shape regardless of what I do to it.)
i guess starting from being not in any kind of shape at all is a good place because, like. ten sit-ups will give me sore muscles. this is who i am, as a person. It’s very time-efficient, getting Results Like That from a literally ten-minute workout.
but probably if i had any abdominal muscles of any kind then i wouldn’t have these intermittent back problems and standing up for long periods of time while lifting moderate weights (like, oh, a chicken, a hundred and eighty times) wouldn’t be Such a Goddamn Trial.
So. Pray for me, I am a mushy 40-year-old doing calisthenics in orthopedic flip-flops. Middle age is so glamorous.
I am reluctantly confronting the fact that some of my physical ailments, which are nebulous and highly-conditional (did I sleep funny? did i wear the wrong shoes? did i stand barefoot too long?) would probably be helped by me doing, like, any exercise of any kind in an organized fashion, instead of just sitting like a lump in a bad office chair for a week at a time in buffalo interspersed with running around like a lunatic for twelve hours a day and then sleeping on a weirdly-tilted mattress for a whole week at the farm. so like.
sigh. i guess i’ll do some situps.
this is day three and i have sore muscles from. basic situps and like. some leg lifts. 101 shit. A lunge or two. Mostly lying around waving my legs in the air because I don’t want to put weight on my stupid fucking sore foot.
listen the last time i tried to work out it was during roller derby and my overall condition was so high that i could ride an exercise bike for an hour and barely sweat on the highest resistance, and it was just so goddamn unrewarding because it was hours of work for basically no result, on top of the hours i was already spending at practice doing literal fucking torture. I wasn’t leaving myself time for any other hobbies and I got real sick of it, and so when I hurt myself I was like “fuck this shit” and entirely stopped all physical exercise apart from the shit I do to live my actual life. (Which is. Like. Reasonably active? Sometimes? Not very. Here’s a weird fact: I lost weight. Yes, the fitness industry is lying to you. Anyway, I’ve stopped counting, and you’re not going to catch me doing shit for a Trimmer Whatever. My shit is my shit and it’s shaped like my shit and I have a lot of experience at it being that shape regardless of what I do to it.)
i guess starting from being not in any kind of shape at all is a good place because, like. ten sit-ups will give me sore muscles. this is who i am, as a person. It’s very time-efficient, getting Results Like That from a literally ten-minute workout.
but probably if i had any abdominal muscles of any kind then i wouldn’t have these intermittent back problems and standing up for long periods of time while lifting moderate weights (like, oh, a chicken, a hundred and eighty times) wouldn’t be Such a Goddamn Trial.
So. Pray for me, I am a mushy 40-year-old doing calisthenics in orthopedic flip-flops. Middle age is so glamorous.
