fun with Google
May. 13th, 2018 12:03 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dragonlady7via https://ift.tt/2GcpK5b
So this morning, brother-in-law was looking on his phone while he cooked the oatmeal. One of the breeding sows has unusually long hair, and they noticed yesterday that her hooves have grown longer than the others’ too. They knew a horse with similar symptoms, who had Cushing’s disease, so they were concerned that Cookies the sow might also have Cushing’s.
So he Googled “cushing’s disease pigs” and got…
like 80 pages of results about guinea pigs. Frustrated, he tried “hogs” and got no better result. He tried a few other things, and settled on “swine”, and at first thought maybe that’d got him somewhere, but in the end, no.
I dug deep in my memory from when I used to do SEO work in the early-00s, and said, “I think you can put a -guinea in there to exclude guinea pigs from the results.”
He did, and it worked, but he started laughing.
“I searched long hair long hooves pig -guinea,” he said. “And I got some good results but it’s suggesting me a pretty disturbing set of things. how long does it take a pig to eat a human body, then pig eat human body 8 minutes, which is weird, will a pig eat a human alive, no thanks, and then pig eats man alive, none of which is anything I want to know about. And then, children’s dentist near me.”
… I don’t have any additional punchline, that’s the punchline. WTF Google.
I asked if it was maybe that the results were saying the pigs would eat a human body but not the hair, and he laughed. “Pigs would absolutely eat hair,” he said, “they would not care.” Then he looked shifty. “Not that I know that.”
(Which, I have discovered, is kind of a running joke; people who raise pigs pretty much constantly have to deal with people joking about hiding bodies, so many of them seem to just make the jokes pre-emptively.)
(Your picture was not posted)
So this morning, brother-in-law was looking on his phone while he cooked the oatmeal. One of the breeding sows has unusually long hair, and they noticed yesterday that her hooves have grown longer than the others’ too. They knew a horse with similar symptoms, who had Cushing’s disease, so they were concerned that Cookies the sow might also have Cushing’s.
So he Googled “cushing’s disease pigs” and got…
like 80 pages of results about guinea pigs. Frustrated, he tried “hogs” and got no better result. He tried a few other things, and settled on “swine”, and at first thought maybe that’d got him somewhere, but in the end, no.
I dug deep in my memory from when I used to do SEO work in the early-00s, and said, “I think you can put a -guinea in there to exclude guinea pigs from the results.”
He did, and it worked, but he started laughing.
“I searched long hair long hooves pig -guinea,” he said. “And I got some good results but it’s suggesting me a pretty disturbing set of things. how long does it take a pig to eat a human body, then pig eat human body 8 minutes, which is weird, will a pig eat a human alive, no thanks, and then pig eats man alive, none of which is anything I want to know about. And then, children’s dentist near me.”
… I don’t have any additional punchline, that’s the punchline. WTF Google.
I asked if it was maybe that the results were saying the pigs would eat a human body but not the hair, and he laughed. “Pigs would absolutely eat hair,” he said, “they would not care.” Then he looked shifty. “Not that I know that.”
(Which, I have discovered, is kind of a running joke; people who raise pigs pretty much constantly have to deal with people joking about hiding bodies, so many of them seem to just make the jokes pre-emptively.)
(Your picture was not posted)
