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dragonlady7via http://ift.tt/1VWyote:
vrabia:
deputychairman:
bomberqueen17:
Don’t do it don’t do it
don’t think about embittered widower Kes Dameron getting upset over the Resistance undermining the New Republic
don’t think about him telling Poe if he joined the Resistance he should stop calling home
don’t think about Poe taking his word for it because Kes Dameron was always a man of his word
don’t think about all the holos Poe recorded on BB-8′s ‘corder and never sent because his Papa had told him not to
don’t think about a scenario wherein BB-8 (vengefully) presents them to Kes and Kes sees how much Poe needed his Papa now that he’s fighting a war
don’t think about tearful holos after friends were killed, that were never sent, asking for comfort that was never given
just don’t think about it
Poe was in a rumpled flight suit, unzipped with the sleeves wrapped around his waist, and a black t-shirt, and looked exhausted. He had a bottle of beer cradled in his hands.
“So I was thinking oh, hey, I should send a holo to my Papa,” Poe said, looking into the recorder. “And then I remembered my Papa told me not to come around anymore because I was a traitor to the Republic. So I guess. I’m not. Recording a holo to my Papa.” He looked miserable, and deflated, and there was a brittleness to the way he was turning the beer bottle in his hands. His expression kept changing in tiny increments, like maybe he was struggling with it.
“So this is me having the awkward realization that I really have nobody in my life to send a holo to,” Poe said, looking down at his hands. “I mean. I could find some friends from school or something, but what do you say?” He scraped at the edge of the bottle’s label with his fingernail. “Hey man, long time no see, I’m a traitor now, but you know the war never actually ended so, really none of it means anything and we’ll never see peace in our lives.” He shrugged, still not looking up. He looked so tired, so worn-down, so hurt.
“I’m lucky,” Poe went on in a moment. “I know that. I’m lucky. So. I was gonna tell you never mind, BB-8, delete this, it’s stupid and embarrassing, but I guess I should keep this as a reminder.” He finally looked up at the camera. “I’m thirty years old and this is the first time I’ve ever really been alone in the world.” He took a slow breath in, and let it out, and it shook a little, audibly. “Some people go their whole lives and never have it as good as I did for so long.”
and
“Papa I miss you,” Poe said, voice hitching a little. He was a dim mass in the bad light, grainy and ill-resolved, the black of his hair the only concrete detail. “Papa I don’t know what to do. The sun keeps coming up and I don’t know how to just– keep going. I know you did it and I never thought to ask you how.” He sobbed. “I don’t know how to do this.”
#yet more star wars daddy issues#aka how poe learned that all love is conditional#everyone goes away eventually#except leia organa#you can keep earning her love#forever#if you die for her#and that’s his career plan#die for leia organa#just like his mama
*ANGUISHED HOWLING*
i hate you guys
y’all know I’m posting the story this is from now, yes? It’s complete but posting in installments for last-minute edits.
“He always was determined to die for you,” Dameron said wryly.
“You can’t think that’s what I want,” Leia said, suddenly profoundly exhausted and heartbroken.
Kes took a step closer to her. “No,” he said softly, “I know it’s not. But it’s what’s necessary, no?”
Leia had been looking down; she raised her head to look up at his face again. “I hope not,” she said.
vrabia:
deputychairman:
bomberqueen17:
Don’t do it don’t do it
don’t think about embittered widower Kes Dameron getting upset over the Resistance undermining the New Republic
don’t think about him telling Poe if he joined the Resistance he should stop calling home
don’t think about Poe taking his word for it because Kes Dameron was always a man of his word
don’t think about all the holos Poe recorded on BB-8′s ‘corder and never sent because his Papa had told him not to
don’t think about a scenario wherein BB-8 (vengefully) presents them to Kes and Kes sees how much Poe needed his Papa now that he’s fighting a war
don’t think about tearful holos after friends were killed, that were never sent, asking for comfort that was never given
just don’t think about it
Poe was in a rumpled flight suit, unzipped with the sleeves wrapped around his waist, and a black t-shirt, and looked exhausted. He had a bottle of beer cradled in his hands.
“So I was thinking oh, hey, I should send a holo to my Papa,” Poe said, looking into the recorder. “And then I remembered my Papa told me not to come around anymore because I was a traitor to the Republic. So I guess. I’m not. Recording a holo to my Papa.” He looked miserable, and deflated, and there was a brittleness to the way he was turning the beer bottle in his hands. His expression kept changing in tiny increments, like maybe he was struggling with it.
“So this is me having the awkward realization that I really have nobody in my life to send a holo to,” Poe said, looking down at his hands. “I mean. I could find some friends from school or something, but what do you say?” He scraped at the edge of the bottle’s label with his fingernail. “Hey man, long time no see, I’m a traitor now, but you know the war never actually ended so, really none of it means anything and we’ll never see peace in our lives.” He shrugged, still not looking up. He looked so tired, so worn-down, so hurt.
“I’m lucky,” Poe went on in a moment. “I know that. I’m lucky. So. I was gonna tell you never mind, BB-8, delete this, it’s stupid and embarrassing, but I guess I should keep this as a reminder.” He finally looked up at the camera. “I’m thirty years old and this is the first time I’ve ever really been alone in the world.” He took a slow breath in, and let it out, and it shook a little, audibly. “Some people go their whole lives and never have it as good as I did for so long.”
and
“Papa I miss you,” Poe said, voice hitching a little. He was a dim mass in the bad light, grainy and ill-resolved, the black of his hair the only concrete detail. “Papa I don’t know what to do. The sun keeps coming up and I don’t know how to just– keep going. I know you did it and I never thought to ask you how.” He sobbed. “I don’t know how to do this.”
#yet more star wars daddy issues#aka how poe learned that all love is conditional#everyone goes away eventually#except leia organa#you can keep earning her love#forever#if you die for her#and that’s his career plan#die for leia organa#just like his mama
*ANGUISHED HOWLING*
i hate you guys
y’all know I’m posting the story this is from now, yes? It’s complete but posting in installments for last-minute edits.
“He always was determined to die for you,” Dameron said wryly.
“You can’t think that’s what I want,” Leia said, suddenly profoundly exhausted and heartbroken.
Kes took a step closer to her. “No,” he said softly, “I know it’s not. But it’s what’s necessary, no?”
Leia had been looking down; she raised her head to look up at his face again. “I hope not,” she said.
