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dragonlady7via http://ift.tt/2ps9I2P:buttons-beads-lace replied to your post “yeahhh not possible to use the health insurance website without…”
‘this is supposed to be simple and I Just Can’t’ is such a hard feeling. hands down my worst ever crying-in-a-public-bathroom was because I got temporarily deferred from donating blood. my heart rate was too fast, and the person told me to take deep calming breaths. and I just had to take a few minutes to have a Thing about how sure it’s supposed to be that simple but I Just Do Not have the ability to control my heart rate. so like. I understand the crying.
ohhhhh my god. Oh! my god! Like. I get so impatient with myself but what the fuck, sometimes I just can’t do things, and why is anything ever anything, ugh.
torrilin
*hugs* I hate this kind of thing.
s-leary
I’m sorry that was so unnecessarily awful. I’m glad you did it, though! *hugs*
meeee tooooo thank you for the sympathy.
deputychairman replied: Oh I’m so sorry that sounds horrible, I always get super nervous at Official Phonecalls in Spanish which I speak fluently and yet on the phone I need everything repeated 6 times and my accent collapses so I sound like the most Foreign Foreigner in the world. Is there any scope for getting a friend to call on your behalf? My colleague has done this for me with driving license & child 1’s passport stuff and I have never been more grateful to another human being.
Ugh at least, like, you have a second language issue. That’s a starting point from which it’s sort of understandable to ask for help. For me it’s like, well, this is a basic life skill I need to perform, in my own native language, in the state where I was born no less, which it’s literally impossible to get by without doing, that for no reason I can explain, always goes awfully wrong, and now I’ve become completely unable to be reasonable about this thing because I have so much negative reinforcement of it going horribly wrong, and if only I could just be chill somehow, but I don’t even know where to begin being chill about it because even phone calls that go well, I obsessively replay afterward in my head for hours (I mispronounced my own name, what the fuck), and then somehow forget entirely so that when the thing discussed becomes relevant I’m completely unprepared. My memory’s pretty bad even for written stuff, but for spoken things, it might as well not have happened, except for the part that ten years on I’ll be able to recite for you the way I misspoke during the greeting and made an absolute ass of myself, in my native language, in my native accent, to people from my native culture.
oh my God.
‘this is supposed to be simple and I Just Can’t’ is such a hard feeling. hands down my worst ever crying-in-a-public-bathroom was because I got temporarily deferred from donating blood. my heart rate was too fast, and the person told me to take deep calming breaths. and I just had to take a few minutes to have a Thing about how sure it’s supposed to be that simple but I Just Do Not have the ability to control my heart rate. so like. I understand the crying.
ohhhhh my god. Oh! my god! Like. I get so impatient with myself but what the fuck, sometimes I just can’t do things, and why is anything ever anything, ugh.
torrilin
*hugs* I hate this kind of thing.
s-leary
I’m sorry that was so unnecessarily awful. I’m glad you did it, though! *hugs*
meeee tooooo thank you for the sympathy.
deputychairman replied: Oh I’m so sorry that sounds horrible, I always get super nervous at Official Phonecalls in Spanish which I speak fluently and yet on the phone I need everything repeated 6 times and my accent collapses so I sound like the most Foreign Foreigner in the world. Is there any scope for getting a friend to call on your behalf? My colleague has done this for me with driving license & child 1’s passport stuff and I have never been more grateful to another human being.
Ugh at least, like, you have a second language issue. That’s a starting point from which it’s sort of understandable to ask for help. For me it’s like, well, this is a basic life skill I need to perform, in my own native language, in the state where I was born no less, which it’s literally impossible to get by without doing, that for no reason I can explain, always goes awfully wrong, and now I’ve become completely unable to be reasonable about this thing because I have so much negative reinforcement of it going horribly wrong, and if only I could just be chill somehow, but I don’t even know where to begin being chill about it because even phone calls that go well, I obsessively replay afterward in my head for hours (I mispronounced my own name, what the fuck), and then somehow forget entirely so that when the thing discussed becomes relevant I’m completely unprepared. My memory’s pretty bad even for written stuff, but for spoken things, it might as well not have happened, except for the part that ten years on I’ll be able to recite for you the way I misspoke during the greeting and made an absolute ass of myself, in my native language, in my native accent, to people from my native culture.
oh my God.
