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dragonlady7via http://ift.tt/2ljnm2z:deputychairman replied to your post “tagged at just the right moment of soul-crushing ennui and certainty…”
Ugh jealousy is the worst, I feel ya. And I don’t suffer from the sexual kind be either - maybe we’re just *so* desirable we know there’s no need?
pff no, that’s not it in my case! I was the kind of kid bullies dared each other to ask out as a joke, so I’ve actually never been asked on a date in my life, I just sort of moved in with my dude, and glommed myself inextricably onto him, as soon as I realized he wasn’t going to object.
I actually think that in my case it’s that I’m so completely and utterly stunted when it comes to picking other people up that I can’t actually imagine my dude picking someone else up and also he’s similarly socially-abled, so I actually have no idea how he’d go about cheating on me, and neither does he, and so I just have absolutely no worry that it could or would ever happen. Which isn’t really justified– surely some other socially-awkward dreamgirl could come along and glomp him up just as ineptly as I did– but it is a welcome relief at least that my brain refuses to consider it.
What my brain did do to me is that when I went to bed earlier than him, and hadn’t thought I’d actually dozed off, it woke me up just after he’d turned off all the lights in the house and gone into the bathroom, but before he’d come out of the bathroom, and convinced me that he had somehow died or vanished (WTF), and actually made me drag myself out of bed and go look for him until I saw the light coming from under the bathroom door, whereupon my brain convinced me that he was somehow dead in there (WTF!!!), and enough of my reason remained that I did not burst into the room (our bathroom door lock broke ten years ago and we never fixed it because it’s only the two of us who live here, so I certainly could have, and he certainly would have died then, of startlement), but instead waited until I heard him moving around, and scampered back to get into bed so I would not have to explain to him that I’d thought he was dead.
I then proceeded to spend the rest of the night intermittently snaking my foot over and poking him with my toes to make sure he was alive whenever I woke up and my brain said, psst want to know what your worst fear is?
Oh February. Ohhh, February. See, January is the month where I just sort of give up on everything, and then February is when my brain tries to come back to life and realizes it doesn’t remember how. So, we can all look forward to more of this shit.
Ha I wrote this because I thought it was sort of funny, but reading back over it, I have a suspicion it isn’t. Sorry!
Ugh jealousy is the worst, I feel ya. And I don’t suffer from the sexual kind be either - maybe we’re just *so* desirable we know there’s no need?
pff no, that’s not it in my case! I was the kind of kid bullies dared each other to ask out as a joke, so I’ve actually never been asked on a date in my life, I just sort of moved in with my dude, and glommed myself inextricably onto him, as soon as I realized he wasn’t going to object.
I actually think that in my case it’s that I’m so completely and utterly stunted when it comes to picking other people up that I can’t actually imagine my dude picking someone else up and also he’s similarly socially-abled, so I actually have no idea how he’d go about cheating on me, and neither does he, and so I just have absolutely no worry that it could or would ever happen. Which isn’t really justified– surely some other socially-awkward dreamgirl could come along and glomp him up just as ineptly as I did– but it is a welcome relief at least that my brain refuses to consider it.
What my brain did do to me is that when I went to bed earlier than him, and hadn’t thought I’d actually dozed off, it woke me up just after he’d turned off all the lights in the house and gone into the bathroom, but before he’d come out of the bathroom, and convinced me that he had somehow died or vanished (WTF), and actually made me drag myself out of bed and go look for him until I saw the light coming from under the bathroom door, whereupon my brain convinced me that he was somehow dead in there (WTF!!!), and enough of my reason remained that I did not burst into the room (our bathroom door lock broke ten years ago and we never fixed it because it’s only the two of us who live here, so I certainly could have, and he certainly would have died then, of startlement), but instead waited until I heard him moving around, and scampered back to get into bed so I would not have to explain to him that I’d thought he was dead.
I then proceeded to spend the rest of the night intermittently snaking my foot over and poking him with my toes to make sure he was alive whenever I woke up and my brain said, psst want to know what your worst fear is?
Oh February. Ohhh, February. See, January is the month where I just sort of give up on everything, and then February is when my brain tries to come back to life and realizes it doesn’t remember how. So, we can all look forward to more of this shit.
Ha I wrote this because I thought it was sort of funny, but reading back over it, I have a suspicion it isn’t. Sorry!
