bomberqueen17: bomberqueen17: OK so we’re probab

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bomberqueen17:

bomberqueen17:

OK so we’re probably going to move the online department at my workplace to a location at the store closer to my house. Cool, I’d love a shorter commute. 

It’d be in office spaces a little separated from the retail space. Even cooler! I don’t mind being so close to the sales floor but I’d be super down with, y’know– not. 

It has two bathrooms, in the upstairs space. Now, there’d be public events up there– classes, studio space, so on. But we can kind of decorate to suit ourselves, if we really want to. So– my question.

I’m good at painting signs. I want to make signs for the bathrooms. I was thinking something funny and gender-neutral. Maybe we could make one bathroom public and the other employees-only. Or whatever.

But I need ideas for what would be funny things to label two gender-neutral restrooms. Words, symbols, concepts– I have paint, and pieces of white siding trimmed down, and paintbrushes, and glitter, and rhinestones. 

Give me some concepts!

ok this is my first concept 

but I dunno man. 

Ugh I am not being shown ANY NOTES on this post so I have to look at the post itself and scroll down.

I should have been clearer– that is a random image I downloaded from the internet, I am NOT PAINTING the WHOLE DOORS, I am MAKING SMALL SIGNS to put on the doors.

So I was asking for OTHER CONCEPTS that might be funny and/or cool! A unicorn and a unicycle is cute, but I was trying to think of other funny or clever things.

To paint. On a small sign. On the door.

NOT that it MATTERS because TUMBLR WON’T SHOW ME MY FUCKING NOTES so NEVER MIND. I just thought I could crowdsource some ideas, but as far as I can tell the notes are all just people giving me feedback on the image that I carelessly did not source and that is not the doors in the space I haven’t even visited yet let alone moved into. 

The only other entertaining concept I could find were the ones that have the man/woman signs and then say “whatever”, which is cute and also fine, and like, sure ok.

I just feel like I’ve seen other funny concepts, and yet when I Google it, all I find is offensive and sort of gross and boring heteronormative bullshit, which is absolutely not what I want. Maybe it’s just in my head that there are other funny ideas I could steal to paint onto small signs to hang on the doors of the space i haven’t yet been into.
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(oh i’m bad at this i posted an entry on

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(oh i’m bad at this i posted an entry on pillowfort and then referenced it in my next entry here as if people are reading both and ugh i don’t even know.)

anyway. Entry here where I talk about the weekend and the interesting excitement of trying to infer any kind of anything from Google Street View in Kyrgyzstan.
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About the Kyrgyz confusion, while it is obvs #aesthetic, it's also that the climate makes decorating

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Oh, that’s true too. And my analysis wasn’t scientific at all– Dude spent all day on Google Maps and kept showing me representative samples. He’d mostly show me interiors, but occasionally he’d be like “… and this is what it looks like on the outside, which if I saw that here I’d just run away.” “And this one’s got a great location, but you wouldn’t know it by Streetview.” 

“That looks like it’s a hundred miles from anywhere,” I agreed. He laughed. “It’s one block over from the main drag of the capital city, which has fully four times the population of the city where we live.” 

It’s just funny because it’s disorienting, I think. Which is, of course, the point of going anywhere far away, right? You see things you wouldn’t see if you stayed home, and you experience how people from far away live their lives, which is going to be different from how you live your life, so there! 

I grew up on an unpaved road, and Dude has basically never seen an unpaved road, so that’s a crucial filter in the perception here, too– he was only showing me stuff he found weird. 
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uh i just saw a gifset of Michael Fassbender that was a close-up on his face while he was talking in

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uh i just saw a gifset of Michael Fassbender that was a close-up on his face while he was talking in a candid setting and not in makeup and uh holy shit he looks old

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I get it, people who are into him, that’s fine, I’m not judging you at all, I’m not not a fan, but oh my god. I had to look up how old he is. He was born in 1977. That’s the same year my older sister was born. He’s two years older than me. 

He has like… really similar coloring to me, is the thing, and like, the same skin type, and like, a similar genetic makeup– he’s Irish and German, I’m Irish and assorted-Germanic/Anglo mutt– and my god, his skin is like… crinkled parchment.

He’s aging like milk, ok, and while it’s generally considered Aesthetically Acceptable for a dude to look like that, he looks like he’s well into his fifties ok, and like. 

Anyway. That was unneccessarily snarky of me I guess, I’m just horrified to contemplate my genetic heritage and our absolutely antagonistic relationship with the passing of time. He’s forty-one and that’s just too much character for one face, all right, he looks like a corrugated shark. 

He looks like someone who’s spent their life working outdoors. Maybe this was a deliberate effort on his part, to get more… rugged parts? 

I’m not judging him, if it was, and sure, he looks attractive, it suits him, but– I’m just sort of staggered by how goddamn old he looks. I had this vague notion that he was about my age, and it was right, and my god, do I have eye crinkles like that I just haven’t noticed???? 

I am going to go moisturize immediately. And put a hat on.
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grayskyluna: kichengunnet: showerthoughtsofficial:

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grayskyluna:

kichengunnet:

showerthoughtsofficial:

“The camera adds 10 pounds” is a phrase of the past. Now people look better in their pictures than they do in person

When people say that the camera adds ten pounds it’s because cameras used in filmmaking/TV production have a wider focal length and therefore subjects look wider or bigger. Whereas cellphone cameras have a short focal length that makes subjects appear thinner or smaller.

Nowadays, with DSLR’s and a variety of lenses, we are able to depict a wide range of focal lengths by using one kind of camera.

So that is why most people on social media may seem to look thinner than they do in person (especially in selfies because the front facing camera on phones especially have short focal lengths).

And that is also how the phrase “the camera adds ten pounds” came about.

this is actually so interesting I had no idea

I’m confused by the terminology, so I’m going to explain what I know. The reason people look better in photos is that we take more of them, mostly. Here’s some elaboration:

“Wider” focal length means smaller number means wider field of view. The opposite of that is telephoto.

It’s true that the traditional lenses for portrait photography of yore were always 50mm or higher. You wanted telephoto to avoid distortion. 

The lower gif is more helpful, with the lens’s focal distance written right on the gif. It gives you some idea. It’s worth pointing out that the distance between the camera and subject varies widely between frames of that gif! The 20mm lens is right on top of him– note how his face posture changes; he had to look down at that first lens– while the 200mm lens is way across a large room from him. And if you pay attention, it’s clear that the 200mm lens is distorting his features the least. Maybe he doesn’t look as thin, but his nose also doesn’t look so big. With the cat, note that the widest-angle lens is so close to the cat’s face it’s casting a shadow on its nose, and there are two doorways in the background; the telephoto lens is across the room and so the background shows less but all of the cat’s body is in the photo.

Wider angle lenses are more common, and easier to come by with today’s smaller sensors. (Consumer cameras generally have smaller sensors than a frame of film, meaning that a lens’s focal distance is longer than it says on the tin, unless it’s a purpose-made lens for that application; that adds some confusion. A modern crop-sensor DSLR with a 35mm lens is exactly the same as a film camera or full-frame pro DSLR with a 50mm lens. If you take that full-frame 50mm lens and put it onto a crop-sensor camera, you’ve got something closer to an 85mm telephoto lens. 50 is classically “neutral”, i.e. neither wide nor telephoto, and is historically the lens most cameras came with.)

With a wide angle lens, you have a lot more freedom to choose a flattering angle– and a much more compelling need to choose a more flattering angle, because a minor difference in positioning the camera makes a huge difference, the closer you are to your subject. 

Most people don’t know what the fuck they’re doing when it comes to photography, but the built-in equipment on cellphones gives us a wide-angle lens, and unlimited trial and error with instant feedback enables anyone to figure out how to take a flattering photo like that. 

The camera used to add 10 pounds because there had to be a camera operator to use it, and the operator didn’t give a shit about you particularly. Now you’re your own camera operator, and you can do what you want, so you’re going to take flattering photos.
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walburgablack replied to your post “About the

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walburgablack replied to your post “About the Kyrgyz confusion, while it is obvs #aesthetic, it’s also…”

oh, I wasn’t assuming you were judging, but that’s an aesthetic choice I haven’t really seen in Western media, but happens a lot even in India, so the entrance to a perfectly nice hotel is a tin shed five minutes down a hillside on a goat-track.

Oh, yeah. And like, around here, it rains so much that if you have an unpaved road, what you have for much of the year is a mudpit. So unimproved dirt roads are only usable if they’re very, very lightly used– as in, extremely light automobile traffic, like maybe a single car per day. And even that– on the farm, there are certain pastures that are just inaccessible from the first snowfall through about mid-April, because they’re too wet to handle vehicle traffic, even one 4-wheel-drive Jeep.

Our road, when I was a kid, had that problem as well– my father had to call in to work on more than one occasion because snow or rain had made our road impassable. Before I was in kindergarten, though, they cut down a bunch of the trees and widened the road, so I don’t really remember it like that. Still, they didn’t pave it until after I moved out, and there were a few days per year when you just had to take it slow. We actually fought the town about paving it, because we kept horses and didn’t shoe them. You can’t ride unshod horses on pavement, it’ll split their hooves.

But in an area without that wet a season / long a winter, a dirt road is perfectly reasonable, I would imagine. Especially if there’s less motorized and more foot/horse traffic. 

(I think this is an aesthetic in the American Southwest, as well, but i haven’t been there since I was a child, and then only briefly, so I don’t recall. I bet I could Streetview around Tucson and find out, though.)
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I just wanted to wear this hair flower again. Huh, too bad I...

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I just wanted to wear this hair flower again. Huh, too bad I don’t have any eyebrows… I mean, who needs them anyway?
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bomberqueen17: uh i just saw a gifset of Michael Fassbender that was a close-up on his face while he

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bomberqueen17:

uh i just saw a gifset of Michael Fassbender that was a close-up on his face while he was talking in a candid setting and not in makeup and uh holy shit he looks old

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Keep reading

oh no here’s another one– I dont’ have a link, i saw a perfectly reasonable gifset of Tom Hiddleston complaining that people ask him for Michael Fassbender’s autograph all the time, and I was like… ok he’s born 1981, he doesn’t look that old does he?

Does he???

So I googled “actress born 1979″ and found out that Claire Danes and Evangeline Lilly are my age, and they don’t look anywhere near that old, so.  [Wahh the first result was Heath Ledger. Wahh! also wtf. I get that “actress” is unnecessarily gendered but huh, Google.]

I guess if you want a double standard boiled down succinctly, there it is. But also what the fuck happened to Fassbender’s face and did he do it on purpose. 
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johnnyjoestarrelatable: rb if you’re a bi bitch

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johnnyjoestarrelatable:

rb if you’re a bi bitch who loves carbs
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vignette:driving home. heavy traffic. sitting there at a light. bored. notice the car in front of me

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vignette:

driving home. heavy traffic. sitting there at a light. bored. notice the car in front of me is a silver PT Cruiser just like the one my mom used to drive during her midlife crisis. It’s got a giant USMC sticker on the top of the rear windshield. Like, OK, I’m figuring “elderly veteran”, whatever, and then I roll up closer and realize there’s another sticker, and it’s the Calvin peeing on a thing sticker, and I’m like, “oh this’ll be good, what is it.”

And it’s so perfect. It’s Calvin peeing on the words “YOUR FEELINGS”. I’m like, this guy– this guy will 1000% lose his entire shit if anyone questions him in any way.

So I take a picture, because I figure that’s going to be a good caption for it. But the light changes, so I put my phone down and go back to, you know, driving my car, figuring I’ll write the caption on later. 

I change lanes because traffic tends to back up in the right lane because there’s an exit coming up, and so I’m sitting there at the next light and everyone’s lights are down and someone’s talking. But like, really clearly, so like– I look around a little, trying to figure out who’s talking. 

IT’S THE GUY, HE’S NEXT TO ME. Fortunately I figure that out before I turn my head or acknowledge him. “Did you take a picture?” he asks. “Were you taking a picture? Were you taking a picture of my stickers?”

I’m like what the fuck, bro. My music is kind of loud so I just ignore him like I couldn’t hear him. He starts snickering to himself but like, loud, though he doesn’t raise his voice any louder than the first thing he said. “I bet your feelings were hurt, huh! Your feelings were hurt!” 

Bro. You are so upset right now that I took a picture of the *~provocative~* sticker on your car, and you want so hard for me to validate you by being offended at your whining. So I sang along to my song for a minute until it ended. (I was listening to Gossip, as it happens.) 

The song ends. He says, into the quiet, “Which of my stickers was it that you were offended by, huh?”

That gets me to turn my head. “Oh, hi,” I said. “No, I thought your Calvin sticker was cute. Have a great day!” And the light changed, so I drove off.

And I posted the photo with the caption I’d originally intended, and also the validation of my experience.

This is a 100% SCIENCE FACT: Anyone with any kind of paraphernalia bearing a slogan about “your feelings” is suuuuuper sensitive about literally everything holy shit. 
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