dragonlady7

Hey #qcrbf we did an official count and the KOs are by far the gayest team, in terms of having now or ever eaten pussy. Total of 10 or 11!
Courage: I don't know if I'd remember how to fuck a dude. Lamb Chop: It's like riding a bicycle. A fleshy, fleshy bicycle. #KOs #gayestteam
Alarm Clock Cat! You have betrayed me by your uncharacteristic silence! Curses! #lateforwork
Oh noo the store next door is closed & I can't steal their wireless Internet! Bummer.
Me=asshole. It's Z's birthday& right after I said "Happy Birthday" was the first instant I realized I didn't get him anything. Oh right. :(
Quick, tweeps, what do I get a geek for his 31st birthday?!?! I'm such an asshole. Spent all yesterday on Gram's eulogy & forgot Z! :(
@MsSamber I just feel like a jerk cuz he's always so good at making the kind of fuss I like on my bday. Well... There's always blowjobs. :)
@zobar2 That also works for me.
RT @Wendy_Mc: If my New York friends get to the airport now you can be here in time for New Year's and we can all party on clear dry pav ...
RT @mountain_goats: trying to keep #yourgeneralizationsaboutwomenaremakingyoulooklikeanasshole trending higher than "things women say" i ...
@zobar2 @amberhayward Of my lifetime achievements, or the gayness?
This year's KO team photo: all wearing rainbow airbrushed "I'd Go Gay For Courage!" shirts; Courage wearing a "Courage" shirt and big smile.
@zobar2 @amberhayward I'm feeling kinda lame about my lifetime achievements in lesbianism. 5 yrs of derby & no drunk teammate makeouts!
@polaroidbaby2 The Googles gave me this: http://aol.it/cEvZFB
K, to Boss: I hope your New Year's resolution is to be less of a jerk!
I was hoping to secretly duck out an hour or so early to pick up stuff for Z's birthday but the 1:00 girl's sulking so I gotta do her job.
@zobar2 @aspleenic Deploying boobs... now!
I bought Z a present! Shiny objects from TJ Maxx Homegoods, for the kitchen. For him for me, cuz, well, it's my kitchen too.
I told the TJM cashier that I felt kinda lucky that I had a dude who would be moderately enthused at a gift of nice Tupperware. Truth!
@zobar2 @aspleenic They're not gonna repo your shorts, your mom bought those for you.
Mom gave me the funeral report. She said ppl kept asking if she needed anything, & she felt she couldn't give a true answer: A casserole.
Reinforces my conviction: when somebody dies, you make their people a damn casserole. Speaking of which, @CrazyLegs24, I owe you a lasagna.
(For the record, lasagna is the #1 recommended casserole for grieving, but be careful not to overuse; don't ruin lasagna forever for them.)
Oh dear @zobar2's mom just got me drunk. Good thing we walked instead of driving.
Dave's birthday gift from his cousin, in honor of Toaster Dog Tuesday http://twitpic.com/3lt7xi
RT @drpattiethomas: #HAES Have you heard about the New Year's ReVolution yet? It's not too late. Don't be left behind! http://2011revolu ...
#HAES stands for Health at Every Size. You think about the Obesity Epidemic? Guess what, I'm medically obese. And I'll probably live to 95.
Obesity Epidemic=media bullshit. Don't resolve to lose weight, resolve to be more awesome. Fuck the diet industry. Be healthy, be happy.