consumer activism
May. 3rd, 2007 10:05 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dragonlady7More and more I realize that a lot of the things that oppress my soul, and that I complain about here, are things that the people who make decisions don't really realize are oppressing my soul.
This is a more useful realization when the things that oppress my soul also happen to be things that oppress the souls of others.
I am speaking, most particularly, about clothing.
Every month or so Land's End flings another catalogue through my mail slot. In the depths of winter, up until spring's blossoms dot the landscape, their emphasis is upon swimsuits. Their cheerful slogan, whose inherent self-contradiction gives me acute, teeth-grinding headaches, is, "Swimsuits for Every Body! Available up to a D cup!"
And countless times I have railed against this.
It finally struck me that my kitchen counter had no input into Land's End's decision-making process when it came to what sizes they manufactured, so why was I spending such a long time angrily haranguing it?
So I emailed Land's End about it, pointing out politely but with some passion that they don't in fact fit everyone, and I am not the only woman my size to feel this way. They wrote back, equally politely, that they valued my feedback and would take it into account-- the boilerplate response.
Another new member posting on one of the large-cup-size communities I recently joined said something about a lingerie shop in their town that says something about fitting everybody, and how they sneer every time they walk past-- but have they ever gone in and said, "You don't fit everyone, you don't carry my size, but if you did I would shop here and tell all my friends."
If only one person does it, usually you get dismissed-- right, you freak, i'm sure you would, but even if you bought ten bras in a year, that's still not enough to offset our costs in stocking your freakish sizes. But how many other women in her town walk past and look at the sign and sneer, as well? More than you'd think.
If they all made the effort to go in and say, "Your sign is wrong and you don't carry my size and that's why I can't shop here either," how many of them would be dismissed as freaks?
In this day and age of the Internet, it's even more effective. It's true, I don't know anyone in my town who wears a bra similar in size to me. I do have a teammate who's a 32DDD and who probably should go down a back size and up a cup size-- making her a 30E, which is impossible to find. But on the Internet, I know dozens upon dozens of other American women-- I'm actually a very common size on the large-cup-size boards. Every other new member who posts her measurements is within a size of me. I'm pretty much normal there, right in the middle of the "freak" spectrum. (33-35" underbust measurement, 42-46" full-bust measurement, which makes you anything from a 36F to a 32J depending on too many factors to list.)
If all of us made a habit of writing to online retailers who don't stock our size, calmly and politely pointing out that we like their products and if they ever stock our size we'd love to buy them-- how long would it be before at least one of them would start expanding their lines?
Maybe only one in ten thousand women has a bra size similar to mine, but the more of them who are educated consumers...
The more of us who buy Bali's shitty 38DDD bras and take in the band ourselves, the more Bali has cause to believe there really are a zillion women out there who actually wear 38DDD, and the more they can tell themselves the lie that only plus-size women have large breasts. This is not true at all. We simply have no options. But we'll never have any options if we don't tell them we're taking in the bands ourselves. And especially if we pay full price for these bras that don't fit, they'll never have any incentive to expand their product lines and make sizes that really fit us-- because we're shouldering the extra expense of making a different size, rather than making them do it.
I've digressed on my pet topic. What started me on this rampage today was an ad on the Rollercon website. It was a cute graphical ad for Sourpuss Clothing, featuring the slogan and then a series of quick photos of people wearing the clothes. Now, half of what rollergirls wear is shit from Sourpuss, because they have awesome t-shirts and cute skirts and nifty crazy punk clothes. I've gone to the site in the past, and have shopped around for a while, before inevitably realizing they have not one thing in my size, except maybe a pair of legwarmers or a bracelet or something.
But this ad-- one of the photos featured in it was a cute rockabilly-goth girlie with heavy bangs, a red flower in her hair, tattooed arms, and-- she looked big. She looked like she might be about my size, but more classically pear-shaped, kind of heavy around the middle, and those tattooed arms looked downright beefy. Awright, I said to myself. If she can shop there, so can I.
But their XL is still meant for a 38" chest measurement. I'm 44". Their largest-sized skirt is meant for a 31" waist. Mine's 33, 34" or so.
You mean to tell me that cute pudgy rockabilly chick with the cute round tattooed arms is a size 10???
...
Should I ask them why none of their tank tops come in a larger size?
...
Well? Why don't more women demand more sizes from their favorite retailers?
...
You got it-- I'm ashamed. I don't want to be the brave freak that speaks up and sounds like an idiot, demanding that they carry something just for me. I know, in my heart, that I'm not that big, and if they carried larger sizes I can think of five or six of my leaguemates alone who'd buy stuff, let alone the population at large.
But nobody wants to be that first fat bitch who goes all snarky on them and gets all prima-donna and entitled, just because she [eats too much, never gets off her fat ass, whatever], that she can dictate how they do business.
That's how it'll sound, I know. I'm a fat fuckin' bitch with no self-control [insert fat stereotype here, if you have one you like more] and I want the world to revolve around me and my poor [eating,exercise,whatever] habits, so you need to change your business model to make me feel better about being such a freak.
But I know I'm not the only one; I know there are more of us than they think; I know that if we never say anything to anyone the situation will never improve and I'll never have anything to wear, and I'll always be ashamed and depressed.
...
I just don't want to be the brave one.
This is a more useful realization when the things that oppress my soul also happen to be things that oppress the souls of others.
I am speaking, most particularly, about clothing.
Every month or so Land's End flings another catalogue through my mail slot. In the depths of winter, up until spring's blossoms dot the landscape, their emphasis is upon swimsuits. Their cheerful slogan, whose inherent self-contradiction gives me acute, teeth-grinding headaches, is, "Swimsuits for Every Body! Available up to a D cup!"
And countless times I have railed against this.
It finally struck me that my kitchen counter had no input into Land's End's decision-making process when it came to what sizes they manufactured, so why was I spending such a long time angrily haranguing it?
So I emailed Land's End about it, pointing out politely but with some passion that they don't in fact fit everyone, and I am not the only woman my size to feel this way. They wrote back, equally politely, that they valued my feedback and would take it into account-- the boilerplate response.
Another new member posting on one of the large-cup-size communities I recently joined said something about a lingerie shop in their town that says something about fitting everybody, and how they sneer every time they walk past-- but have they ever gone in and said, "You don't fit everyone, you don't carry my size, but if you did I would shop here and tell all my friends."
If only one person does it, usually you get dismissed-- right, you freak, i'm sure you would, but even if you bought ten bras in a year, that's still not enough to offset our costs in stocking your freakish sizes. But how many other women in her town walk past and look at the sign and sneer, as well? More than you'd think.
If they all made the effort to go in and say, "Your sign is wrong and you don't carry my size and that's why I can't shop here either," how many of them would be dismissed as freaks?
In this day and age of the Internet, it's even more effective. It's true, I don't know anyone in my town who wears a bra similar in size to me. I do have a teammate who's a 32DDD and who probably should go down a back size and up a cup size-- making her a 30E, which is impossible to find. But on the Internet, I know dozens upon dozens of other American women-- I'm actually a very common size on the large-cup-size boards. Every other new member who posts her measurements is within a size of me. I'm pretty much normal there, right in the middle of the "freak" spectrum. (33-35" underbust measurement, 42-46" full-bust measurement, which makes you anything from a 36F to a 32J depending on too many factors to list.)
If all of us made a habit of writing to online retailers who don't stock our size, calmly and politely pointing out that we like their products and if they ever stock our size we'd love to buy them-- how long would it be before at least one of them would start expanding their lines?
Maybe only one in ten thousand women has a bra size similar to mine, but the more of them who are educated consumers...
The more of us who buy Bali's shitty 38DDD bras and take in the band ourselves, the more Bali has cause to believe there really are a zillion women out there who actually wear 38DDD, and the more they can tell themselves the lie that only plus-size women have large breasts. This is not true at all. We simply have no options. But we'll never have any options if we don't tell them we're taking in the bands ourselves. And especially if we pay full price for these bras that don't fit, they'll never have any incentive to expand their product lines and make sizes that really fit us-- because we're shouldering the extra expense of making a different size, rather than making them do it.
I've digressed on my pet topic. What started me on this rampage today was an ad on the Rollercon website. It was a cute graphical ad for Sourpuss Clothing, featuring the slogan and then a series of quick photos of people wearing the clothes. Now, half of what rollergirls wear is shit from Sourpuss, because they have awesome t-shirts and cute skirts and nifty crazy punk clothes. I've gone to the site in the past, and have shopped around for a while, before inevitably realizing they have not one thing in my size, except maybe a pair of legwarmers or a bracelet or something.
But this ad-- one of the photos featured in it was a cute rockabilly-goth girlie with heavy bangs, a red flower in her hair, tattooed arms, and-- she looked big. She looked like she might be about my size, but more classically pear-shaped, kind of heavy around the middle, and those tattooed arms looked downright beefy. Awright, I said to myself. If she can shop there, so can I.
But their XL is still meant for a 38" chest measurement. I'm 44". Their largest-sized skirt is meant for a 31" waist. Mine's 33, 34" or so.
You mean to tell me that cute pudgy rockabilly chick with the cute round tattooed arms is a size 10???
...
Should I ask them why none of their tank tops come in a larger size?
...
Well? Why don't more women demand more sizes from their favorite retailers?
...
You got it-- I'm ashamed. I don't want to be the brave freak that speaks up and sounds like an idiot, demanding that they carry something just for me. I know, in my heart, that I'm not that big, and if they carried larger sizes I can think of five or six of my leaguemates alone who'd buy stuff, let alone the population at large.
But nobody wants to be that first fat bitch who goes all snarky on them and gets all prima-donna and entitled, just because she [eats too much, never gets off her fat ass, whatever], that she can dictate how they do business.
That's how it'll sound, I know. I'm a fat fuckin' bitch with no self-control [insert fat stereotype here, if you have one you like more] and I want the world to revolve around me and my poor [eating,exercise,whatever] habits, so you need to change your business model to make me feel better about being such a freak.
But I know I'm not the only one; I know there are more of us than they think; I know that if we never say anything to anyone the situation will never improve and I'll never have anything to wear, and I'll always be ashamed and depressed.
...
I just don't want to be the brave one.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2007-05-03 02:55 pm (UTC)I'm willing to go in on you with some sort of campaign to contact of these companies. I'm tired of being treated like a second-class citizen because my clothing size is in the double-digits , and even, *gasp* in the twenties.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-03 06:44 pm (UTC)I admit my like of it was a little tempered by the fact that I was, at that point in my life, teetering between a size 14 and 16, and most stores stop at 14 and that sucked. Old Navy probably had a really pathetic selection above 16, but there would usually be at least 1 size 16 on any given rack, even if it was in only one color.
I don't want to start "a campaign" or anything-- I don't want to do anything really organized that will be noticeable as organized. I just want to encourage women of unusual dimensions to speak up when they are shopping and can't find anything. It's far, far more common than anyone realizes, I am sure, but I hear it everywhere-- from petites, from pluses, from busty girls, from bootylicious girls-- I do not know one person who can happily go to the store, immediately find something in a style that flatters her, and have her size be there easy to find and in exactly the color she wants, with no weird inexplicable fit or quality issues. Everyone has something.
I just think there are some noticeable trends in the "something", and that is that despite the documented statistics of the average size of an American woman, the sizes on the racks are disproportionately skewed towards the medium-small end of the scale. I just don't think manufacturers are aware in full of how many customers they're closing out, and it doesn't help of course that "obesity" is such a hot-button issue with so much emotional baggage attached to it.
So: if they don't have your size, ask them for it before you sigh and walk away, or they will never know there's a demand. The more of us that do it, the less they can afford to dismiss us as freaks.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-03 03:33 pm (UTC)/Eva
no subject
Date: 2007-05-03 06:49 pm (UTC)Several of the major large-cup British bra manufacturers have relatively consistent sizing, so those are the ones I know-- Freya, Panache, and Fantasie are all roughly equivalent, though across styles it can vary.
American sizing charts all disagree on how many inches you should add. Most women of larger cup sizes agree that if you're over a C or so, you shouldn't add any inches at all to your measurement, because you need the band to fit tightly. I don't think there's any real understanding of how bras are meant to fit in the US, that's the only conclusion I can reach.
The state of women's fashion in general in the US confuses and annoys the hell out of me, to be honest.
All I know is, I measure 33" around the ribcage, 44" over the bust, and I cannot make that make any sense in any American sizes, but it doesn't matter as almost nobody in this country seems to manufacture lingerie for those dimensions anyway.
And I'm not that busty.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-03 04:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-03 06:52 pm (UTC)My own sister was a department store bra-fitter and not even she could find me a bra that fit me. We looked for hours. We got the cups fitted, but the bands fastened on the tightest hook immediately and within hours were up over my shoulder blades.
Ah well.
Another good site I've found is figleaves.com, which has a US version with fast cheapish shipping and free return shipping. They have a similar selection to Bravissimo, though not as attractively presented.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-03 05:58 pm (UTC)And yet in England, and recently in Germany, I do seem to find attractive, well-fitting clothes relatively easily, both in the large section (where the fashions seem better) and in the normal section (which actually seems to stock all the sizes). Ask eveiya! We went clothes-shopping together in Scotland and there was *so much* for me to try on, all reasonable stuff that can be worn by people not quite ready to give in to mumus.
The ironic thing is that I am pretty sure people in Europe are thinner, on average. So it makes less sense for the shops here to cater to the larger girl...
no subject
Date: 2007-05-03 06:53 pm (UTC)That's all I got.
p.s. I am so totally moving to Europe.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-03 06:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-03 06:15 pm (UTC)I'm also increasingly annoyed and horrified by what is being tagged as "plus size." Waists in the 30" range are normal, for heaven's sake.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-03 06:31 pm (UTC)Recently for the first time in my entire life (though I am far from my thinnest adult point) I've started to be much more comfortable with myself, and have started to believe that I am a good size and shape and don't really need to feel guilty about my size. For the record, I'm not particularly big, on the scale of humanity-- I'm a size 12/14, just busty. I don't have any other fit issues besides the bust. So I can shop in regular stores, except for bras.
And now, now, for the first time in my life I have an idiot primary care physician who ignores all my other health issues and focuses on my "obesity", because the numbers on her chart say I should weigh 30 pounds less than I do.
And now, suddenly, I'm a size-positive activist. That's really all it took for me. I genuinely cannot believe that I am obese, and genuinely think there is something wrong with a culture that ostracizes me for it. I think I am healthy, and think I should not be striving to change myself. If I want to be trimmer it is because i want to be stronger, not because I think the abstract number on the inside label of my pants should be different.
And I'm outraged at the abstract lines drawn between "plus size" and "misses" etc., because they seem, to my eyes, to have no bearing on the different kinds of women I see.
There is no similar division in men's fashion, is there? No.
You're absolutely right-- more and more normal-sized garments are being marketed as "plus size", probably because the marketing sections of clothing companies are saying "plus size is hot!" and the cheapest way to increase their plus-size offerings is just to label what used to just be regular as plus.
I think we should do away with the labels entirely, as they're not doing anyone any good, as any meaning they once had has passed into nothingness.
But I don't think getting angry does anyone any good, so I try not to. I'm trying not to be An Activist, I'm just trying to be a good customer and give my feedback. Which, in my case, is, "I can't buy from you because you don't stock my size, which is n. Do let me know if you get it."
I can't change their rules from outside. I'm trying to play by them. We'll see how it works.