hot patootie
Dec. 15th, 2005 09:19 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dragonlady7Yesterday was, on the whole, a perfectly lovely day, and I did spend a lot of time reading LJ although it seems I didn't update.
I sort of abandoned productivity. I got some tidying done, and a bit of work on the recipe book of Doom, but mostly I browsed through the various works of fiction in various states of abandon on my hard drive. I tidied up a few things, posted a few old things, caught up a little on other things, and even, briefly, while waiting to hear from Z about whether I should cook dinner or not, started in on a somewhat new thing. I wound up writing the start to a shortish side piece in which Lothiriel gets insane amounts of sex, and I would worry about my state of mind in writing such a thing except that smut is just so much fun. So hopefully I'll get a chance to polish that up a bit; I know there are people who would enjoy a healthy hot fresh dose of Eomer/Lothiriel smut. Not least me.
Gay Elves reminded me that they also enjoy smut, but nothing productive has come of that yet.
It was nice, to sit awhile and remember what it was like to have time to just write and not be guilty about what else I should be doing. I don't know why I wasn't guilty, I just wasn't, so I took that as it came.
Now I'm way too far behind on other stuff, but I also cannot make myself care about that.
Meanwhile a package arrived, very mysteriously. I asked Z what it was, and he told me it was something he'd ordered and I should put it in his room. I asked whether it was my Extra Super Present, and he said it was. So I did make an effort to be Extra Super Good, which is the only reason I got off the couch all day yesterday. I managed to fold and put away most of the laundry and do most of the dishes. So when he came home, absolutely exhausted, he told me I was Extra Super Good and could have my Extra Super Special present.
Then he gave me a hug and told me that was my present.
In the end it wound up being something marginally better than a hug, but I only say "marginally" because hugs are, of course, so good. It was something it wouldn't have been appropriate to unwrap in front of family, though, so it was just as well he'd bestowed it early. I will, in a rare show of good taste, not reveal what it was, although a classier sort probably wouldn't have mentioned it in the first place.
So today we're supposed to get a monster snowstorm. I didn't try to fix the snowblower; I don't think I'd have anything to contribute to the discussion that hasn't already been said. (Despite having witnessed a great deal of mechanic work, I remain less mechanically-inclined than one might think.)
I don't really want to go to work today. I dreamed last night of being at work, and there were these girls who were dangerously drunk, and we were on some sort of mission to stop them from getting more alcohol, and I woke up with this feeling that what I do is so utterly meaningless and futile and I just can't stand to spend another day behind a bar. Which, I must say, is the truth: what the hell is the point of feeding people when they only get hungry again? But that's not a very constructive way to start the week.
I need to start hunting for a different job.
I am sorely tempted to save up a bunch of money and then ask them to cut my hours for a month, so I could only work one day a week or something like that for a while, so maybe I could get back to doing some writing and see what I can do and whether if I had the time I could actually write something now. But it's a daydream at this point. Still, less ballsy than quitting. But a daydream nonetheless.
I sort of abandoned productivity. I got some tidying done, and a bit of work on the recipe book of Doom, but mostly I browsed through the various works of fiction in various states of abandon on my hard drive. I tidied up a few things, posted a few old things, caught up a little on other things, and even, briefly, while waiting to hear from Z about whether I should cook dinner or not, started in on a somewhat new thing. I wound up writing the start to a shortish side piece in which Lothiriel gets insane amounts of sex, and I would worry about my state of mind in writing such a thing except that smut is just so much fun. So hopefully I'll get a chance to polish that up a bit; I know there are people who would enjoy a healthy hot fresh dose of Eomer/Lothiriel smut. Not least me.
Gay Elves reminded me that they also enjoy smut, but nothing productive has come of that yet.
It was nice, to sit awhile and remember what it was like to have time to just write and not be guilty about what else I should be doing. I don't know why I wasn't guilty, I just wasn't, so I took that as it came.
Now I'm way too far behind on other stuff, but I also cannot make myself care about that.
Meanwhile a package arrived, very mysteriously. I asked Z what it was, and he told me it was something he'd ordered and I should put it in his room. I asked whether it was my Extra Super Present, and he said it was. So I did make an effort to be Extra Super Good, which is the only reason I got off the couch all day yesterday. I managed to fold and put away most of the laundry and do most of the dishes. So when he came home, absolutely exhausted, he told me I was Extra Super Good and could have my Extra Super Special present.
Then he gave me a hug and told me that was my present.
In the end it wound up being something marginally better than a hug, but I only say "marginally" because hugs are, of course, so good. It was something it wouldn't have been appropriate to unwrap in front of family, though, so it was just as well he'd bestowed it early. I will, in a rare show of good taste, not reveal what it was, although a classier sort probably wouldn't have mentioned it in the first place.
So today we're supposed to get a monster snowstorm. I didn't try to fix the snowblower; I don't think I'd have anything to contribute to the discussion that hasn't already been said. (Despite having witnessed a great deal of mechanic work, I remain less mechanically-inclined than one might think.)
I don't really want to go to work today. I dreamed last night of being at work, and there were these girls who were dangerously drunk, and we were on some sort of mission to stop them from getting more alcohol, and I woke up with this feeling that what I do is so utterly meaningless and futile and I just can't stand to spend another day behind a bar. Which, I must say, is the truth: what the hell is the point of feeding people when they only get hungry again? But that's not a very constructive way to start the week.
I need to start hunting for a different job.
I am sorely tempted to save up a bunch of money and then ask them to cut my hours for a month, so I could only work one day a week or something like that for a while, so maybe I could get back to doing some writing and see what I can do and whether if I had the time I could actually write something now. But it's a daydream at this point. Still, less ballsy than quitting. But a daydream nonetheless.
Na Hah!
Date: 2005-12-15 11:25 pm (UTC)- Z
Re: Na Hah!
Date: 2005-12-16 02:16 am (UTC):D
But all subtle-like.
And the hug was nice. You can give me more of those anytime.