new boobs!
Aug. 31st, 2005 10:23 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dragonlady7My order from Bravissimo arrived today, much to my excitement. I immediately tried everything on and ran around the house looking for a full-length mirror. I dug one out and set it up and... couldn't decide what fit me and what didn't. Folks, this isn't science. This makes no sense. Clothes, they are a terrible brain-sucking wrong thing, and henceforth we should all go naked. Cuz this is ridiculous.
The halter top fits. I am a fox. It is foxy.
The plunge-front black satin bra fits. I am wearing it now. It is foxy.
The white cotton bra, the same size as the black bra, does not fit. I tried it on three or four times, and finally when Z came home he was able to determine that I should probably go down one band size but the cup size was all right, probably, even though a 36F would be slightly smaller in the cup than a 38F, because there's a tiny bit extra in the cups even when I'm not falling out the bottom. But only a tiny bit.
The shirts?
Oy.
The button-down shirt about which I was so excited, the "super curvy" shirt that promised it would fasten shut across my boobs whilst not imitating a tent over the rest of my torso?
Fits me nicely across the boobs. Has shoulders large enough for a weightlifter. It fits me like a tent and the '3/4' length sleeves hit just above my wrists. Damn thing looks like a chef's coat. So that's severely disappointing. Apparently they're cool with my boobs and waist being the proportions they are, but I have freakishly small shoulders. Now there's something it never even crossed my mind to be insecure about...
And I've just visited their website, and it's been updated since this morning, and they no longer offer the shirt I bought. Oh my. In fact they only offer one shirt now. Hm.
The other shirt I got, a sleeveless buttonless jobbie, is the same way. It fits beautifully from breasts downward, and then there is seriously three extra inches of fabric above my shoulders. I can pull it down so the shoulders fit, but then the cute under-boobs seam is, er, at my belly button. Which makes my belly look rather oddly out of proportion. I sort of like the shirt anyway, but then I noticed that it's got a lipstick stain on the inside collar, which is sort of... er, I don't wear lipstick.
So. Disappointing, given that it's going to cost me $10 to ship this back to them, and then I think I'll have to pay shipping on whatever else I order if I'm not just exchanging for a different size (with the sleeveless shirt, I can see fine well that I've got the right size and that's as close as they're going to get short of hiring a tailor). So, sad. I've really been looking forward to all this.
But, on the other hand, the halter top is fabulous, and, er, I can wear it next summer when it's warm again provided I don't change size. Dammit. (Autumn has descended suddenly here; it no longer gets much above seventy anymore, and if it does you bet your ass I'm at work.) Anyway, the black bra is sexier than sex itself. Sound the sexy alert.
It's a shame, however, that I am a big-boobed woman with freakishly small shoulders who will never find anything that fits her. I am now deeply ashamed of my freakish shoulders. Ashamed! I am a freak.
The halter top fits. I am a fox. It is foxy.
The plunge-front black satin bra fits. I am wearing it now. It is foxy.
The white cotton bra, the same size as the black bra, does not fit. I tried it on three or four times, and finally when Z came home he was able to determine that I should probably go down one band size but the cup size was all right, probably, even though a 36F would be slightly smaller in the cup than a 38F, because there's a tiny bit extra in the cups even when I'm not falling out the bottom. But only a tiny bit.
The shirts?
Oy.
The button-down shirt about which I was so excited, the "super curvy" shirt that promised it would fasten shut across my boobs whilst not imitating a tent over the rest of my torso?
Fits me nicely across the boobs. Has shoulders large enough for a weightlifter. It fits me like a tent and the '3/4' length sleeves hit just above my wrists. Damn thing looks like a chef's coat. So that's severely disappointing. Apparently they're cool with my boobs and waist being the proportions they are, but I have freakishly small shoulders. Now there's something it never even crossed my mind to be insecure about...
And I've just visited their website, and it's been updated since this morning, and they no longer offer the shirt I bought. Oh my. In fact they only offer one shirt now. Hm.
The other shirt I got, a sleeveless buttonless jobbie, is the same way. It fits beautifully from breasts downward, and then there is seriously three extra inches of fabric above my shoulders. I can pull it down so the shoulders fit, but then the cute under-boobs seam is, er, at my belly button. Which makes my belly look rather oddly out of proportion. I sort of like the shirt anyway, but then I noticed that it's got a lipstick stain on the inside collar, which is sort of... er, I don't wear lipstick.
So. Disappointing, given that it's going to cost me $10 to ship this back to them, and then I think I'll have to pay shipping on whatever else I order if I'm not just exchanging for a different size (with the sleeveless shirt, I can see fine well that I've got the right size and that's as close as they're going to get short of hiring a tailor). So, sad. I've really been looking forward to all this.
But, on the other hand, the halter top is fabulous, and, er, I can wear it next summer when it's warm again provided I don't change size. Dammit. (Autumn has descended suddenly here; it no longer gets much above seventy anymore, and if it does you bet your ass I'm at work.) Anyway, the black bra is sexier than sex itself. Sound the sexy alert.
It's a shame, however, that I am a big-boobed woman with freakishly small shoulders who will never find anything that fits her. I am now deeply ashamed of my freakish shoulders. Ashamed! I am a freak.
