i can't make it on my own

[dragonlady7]

Sorry, am listening to Morphine. I'm not actually that nihilistic at the moment. Although I am insatiably hungry.
dave and I are sitting on our sunporch, where I now have my computer set up, and are listening to Morphine while Dave raves about... typography. His resume, by the way, is laid out in Adobe Indesign and is so totally sexy. Oh yes. It's obsessively typographed.
He did email it to someone today, so I'm encouraged.

We built a trellis out of twine and pipes. It's ghetto and somewhat spidery, and also beautiful because we made it.
Most of it's behind the garage so nobody's going to care.
The beans still aren't up. Bugger.

GOD I am so hungry.

We went for a bike ride just before dinner, and it sort of just made me really hungry. The point of exercising is to burn more calories than you take in. if you wind up hungry all the time, so that you eat more, it kind of doesn't work. I'm like about to chew someone's leg off, possibly mine, so I don't know that this is going to be at all productive. Eh well.
Reminds me of a conversation in high school with Rennie and Sabrina about instant weight loss-- just lop off a limb. I mean, an arm's like what, fifteen pounds? A leg could be up to forty? Totally, dude. I vaguely recall sitting in the chapel, and Sabrina drawing a dotted line across the fleshy bit of her calf and writing "20 lbs". I wonder whatever happened to her. She must be cooler now. I'm way cooler than I was at 16. I was a twit at 16. hell, if I met my 20-yr-old self now I'd smack her.

I do feel productive-- did some good gardening work, got exercise, did a teeny bit of cleaning, fed the fish, and oh, got some fic writing done. Yes. It felt rather nice-- last bit I did anything at all with was almost a week ago. So, not too shabby day really. Shoulda done the laundry, tho'.

ETA:
Mmm. Chocolate stegosaurus. Last of the Easter candy. Mmm. BTW, am listening to this song and it's good.
a good woman is hard to find
a good woman is hard to find

Comments

[tehta.livejournal.com]

I have to say that my experience of exercise has been the same. There have been times in my life when I have exercised quite obsessively and it makes me fitter, not thinner, since I eat more. To lose weight, I have to consciously watch my food intake. The only exception to this is backpacking. I tend to lose weight when walking all day with a heavy pack.

[dragonlady7.livejournal.com]

I think the only reason I've lost any weight at all is that I get much of my exercise at work, and don't have food readily available to me there, so I will just be hungry for hours and then be too tired to eat much.
Which is stupid. I hate starving myself. It's just icky. But I didn't even exercise that much yesterday and I was ravenous and couldn't think about anything else. I ate dinner far too fast and then sat around in denial for two hours before being unable to ignore it any longer.

Bah, I don't want to have to resort to actually counting calories. That's just really not like me. At least Dave's handy in that if there's more food but I've eaten just enough, I can feed the rest to him. He's lost weight, you know, which is very bad indeed as he's already about 50 pounds underweight. (Which really doesn't help me very much, at least psychologically...)

[tehta.livejournal.com]

I don't think counting calories is necessary--eating so much healthy food you're not so hungry for the unhealthy kind seems to work, too. Pity there's no healthy food of any sort anywhere near my workplace, so if I don't bring lunch I'm screwed...

[dragonlady7.livejournal.com]

I know the feeling. I am pretty satisfied with my diet of late, though-- thank heavens they have reasonable things to eat at work. I could probably do a lot more snacking than I do-- the other cocktail waitress is forever going into the kitchen and sneaking a chicken wing here, a few french fries there-- but I have refused to believe that this is something that's even possible for me, and so I will starve in desperation outside the kitchen convincing myself I've no choice.
Now if only I could do that at home I'd be a size 10 in no time. But, no. Besides, all that starving yourself really does is lower your metabolism, and that won't do.

I am proud of myself for biking right past Hanna's Frosty Treats yesterday (the ice cream shop on the way to Delaware Park, where we often ride our bikes) on the principle that no matter how much exercise I may or may not be getting, there is no excuse for going out for ice cream three days in a row. (Even if on the second day I only had a lemon ice-- still, sugar has as many calories as fat.)

I used to be an absolute pro at packing good lunches for Dave, but I've sort of lost my edge. Maybe when he's gone back to work I'll get good at it again. I have this fantasy in my brain that we're going to manage to get some sort of regular schedule somehow so I can be more organized about life, but I have little real hope of it-- not while my schedule remains the one they use to fill in all the gaps at work. (For the last six weeks I've worked 2:00-8:30 on Wednesdays, but last week they gave me the day off and this week I'm working 9:30-4:30. Go figure.)

[kkatowll.livejournal.com]

You won Canada? :)

[dragonlady7.livejournal.com]

It's a rather old and highly sarcastic icon I found years ago. it's only become funnier with age. Did you read it closely? I've used it any number of times before now.

[spacellama.livejournal.com]

Of course typography is fascinating. I have books and books on the subject, and we giggle over ligatures and swirly descenders here at office parties with too much hooch. So can understand completely.

Are you exercising a lot lately, or is it my imagination? Don't get yourself all wafer-thin, gal! Then the beautiful corsets won't work so well.

[dragonlady7.livejournal.com]

I dunno much about typography. (Crap, now that song's stuck in my head.) Dave's sister is a graphic designer, and he spent one summer as her intern, so he's actually pretty damn good at design despite his protestations to the contrary. (Actually it's disgusting how many things he's good at, being a software engineer who is a highly competent writer (his short prose skills outshine mine) and an excellent designer. Now if only he'd take out the garbage or do dishes...)

I am attempting to exercise a lot. I have a secret goal which isn't so much a goal as a kind of a wish, to have lost enough weight / changed shape enough for it to be significant by the time my mother, who has been harping on me about my weight (about which I have resolutely refused to care) since before I was even fat, comes to visit in early July. I would like for her to be impressed by how good I look. And my having lost tennish pounds won't cut it, because I am large enough to lose tennish pounds and not notice them. (You will recall I thought that my pants had stretched. I don't look any different, it's just that my clothes are saggy now.)

I am thinking that I could lose another fifteen pounds and I would probably only go down maybe two cup sizes. Mind you my sister katy has quite similar bone structure to me so I have a pretty good idea what I'd look like if I ran three miles a day and were made all of muscles, and it's not a bad sight at all. But I've reasonable confidence I'll never look like that. I'd be happy just to be thin enough not to get the extra-chunk-of-boob-spilling-out-of-bra when I wear a size F that I got goin' on at the moment. I think being a 170ish perhaps-D-cup would be perfectly acceptable, and wouldn't cost me too much in the corsetry department.

No worries about wafers: ain't nobody in my mom's family ever been a wafer. I think Ann is the skinniest of us, and she's a D cup and is probably 5' 8" and 140. She wears corsets to parties where her favorite party-trick is to stick a can of beer in her cleavage and then proceed to drink from it. (A trick, I might mention, that I taught her. Works better with bottles, though.)

affinity

[(Anonymous)]

Crank up your font size, grab a thoroughly decadent script like Zapfino, dig around for the scandalously elusive 'ffi' ligature, and plop one of those right in the middle of a blank page.



I defy you to look at this three-letter triumph of the human will and tell me that Hermann Zapf has not drunk deeply from the cup of life.


- Z

Re: affinity

[spacellama.livejournal.com]

Old skool (or is that old style?), indeed. The ffi ligature is the only thing sexier than a really tight Va kern.