i am in the wrong crowd

[dragonlady7]

I badly, badly want this.

I have absolutely nowhere to wear it.
Nor have I the money for it.
I don't even know what I would wear it *with*.
And I hate the sort of people who wear this kind of thing.

But sweet Christ do I ever want it. (I've wanted one since I was 18 and it was pointed out to me that I have spectacular breasts and would look fabulous in one. In my current lifestyle, all said breasts ever do is get in the way. Ow. [for real for serious: in my work uniform I look like I'm a pudgy B-cup, rather than the less-pudgy DDD I really am. the uniform vest was designed with a man's torso in mind. If I could sew I would put darts in it. But I can't.])

Also, this is also just my size, and I do look good in red.

Sigh.
This covetous moment brought to you courtesy of, of all people, Neil Gaiman's blog. No, I'm not a goth, but I would be damn hot as one.


edited to add: this one is damn hot too. Drool.

Comments

[tehta.livejournal.com]

Ooh. I think I'd look pretty good in that, too. And I know just what club I could wear it to. Of course, the one time I wore a serious corset (borrowed from a friend) I fainted.

[dragonlady7.livejournal.com]

I've worn a fairly serious corset before and I thought it was pretty comfortable, actually. The trick is to find one that doesn't pinch and that supports rather than cutting off air supply. I have the sort of figure that's ideally suited for corsets, and actually isn't well-suited by pretty much anything else.

I am jealous, because I can't even think of what club I'd wear such a thing to.

I actually don't know what you look like except that you're tall and Glorfindelesque in coloration, but I bet it would look good on you. I'm not really tall enough to pull off the dominatrix look. :/


And Dave? I showed Dave and he was like "meh, it wouldn't suit you." !! He has lost so many points today. I'm tempted to buy it just to spite him but that wouldn't really get me anywhere except poorer, so I suppose I'll curb the temptation.
*grumble*
Sigh. He's probably right, and that depresses me.

[maggiehoneybite.livejournal.com]

I am jealous, because I can't even think of what club I'd wear such a thing to.

I am doubly jealous; I have neither a club to wear said corset to, nor the breasts to pull it off. But hey, at least they don't get in the way. :) (Looking on the bright side).

[dragonlady7.livejournal.com]

It depends on the corset. Some of them work better on different shapes. I am barred from wearing any at all of the cheap and cute lingerie-style ones you can get in the mall because my boobs are, well, formidable opponents and don't play nice with incompetent support garments. So perhaps that one wouldn't suit you, but there is a whole galaxy of ridiculous club-wear open to you, more than likely. (Although I don't know your shape.)

Don't you live in something that calls itself a decent city? There must be someplace to wear ridiculous things like that.

I am telling myself, in a case of obvious sour-grapes, that it wouldn't suit me anyway and one day when I once again have discretionary income I'll find something even hotter. But those buckles were oddly compelling... Sigh.

> get in the way

Two days ago I ran into a door-frame with one of 'the girls' and let me tell you did it ever hurt. Oh my lord. I sat on the floor clutching at myself like an idiot and cursing, and thinking that there was definitely too much of me if it was catching on door-frames. Whatever part of my brain is in charge of keeping track of my body parts is convinced that I am a petite and diminutive creature, and reality keeps intruding to remind me that I am not. Ow.

[maggiehoneybite.livejournal.com]

Although I don't know your shape.

36A, baby! (Unchanged since age 15). But a little to hippy to pull of the skinny-skinny look.

Don't you live in something that calls itself a decent city? There must be someplace to wear ridiculous things like that.

Oh, I'm sure there are. My problem is that I have no one to go with: my co-workers don't do clubs, my club-going friends don't live in town, and my husband is practically allergic to anything other than sit-down pubs.

[dragonlady7.livejournal.com]

The other night I was sharing a shift with one of my younger co-workers. She's probably 20 or 21, and is similar to my height, somewhat hippy in build, and also blonde.
She was complaining that she couldn't shop at Victoria's Secret because they didn't carry her size, as she was too small. That struck me as astonishing. I replied that I couldn't shop there either because they didn't carry my size, as I am too large.
We sighed together about being abnormal, and came to the consensus that the perfect bra size to be would probably be a 36 C. Because that would be big enough to do something with, but small enough that you wouldn't have to go to extraordinary measures to keep them under control.

But I know one of my sisters is a 36 C, or was for years, and always complained about never finding bras that fit right, so I think perfection is an illusion.

no one to go with
Me too! It's feasible there might be such places even in my little city, and if not there certainly are in Toronto which is daytripping distance, but I've got nobody who's even remotely interested either. Feh! And one can't just make clubbing friends at the drop of a hat...
The really frustrating thing, of course, is that my boyfriend used to like doing all that stuff but now feels himself too mature for it. Bzuh! Wait! Don't grow up without me! Stay here! Dammit. Not even one inane roadtrip to Toronto for nostalgia's sake?
*pout*

[maggiehoneybite.livejournal.com]

Me too! It's feasible there might be such places even in my little city, and if not there certainly are in Toronto which is daytripping distance, but I've got nobody who's even remotely interested either.

If ever you find yourself in Montreal, we should go clubbing. :)

[dragonlady7.livejournal.com]

Oh most definitely! :D Someday when I ever have more than a day off at a time I'll totally visit Montreal and I'll take you up on that, just you wait.

I lived in upstate NY my whole life and only went to Montreal once, on a daytrip with a bunch of 15-year-olds. I was astonished at how easy French is. And how absolutely gorgeous the Northway is. (OMG. Someday drive down during daylight to Saratoga. I don't even care what you do in Saratoga. Just the view-- OMG. Liek for wow.)

[dragonlady7.livejournal.com]

It's tough to judge, but yes, I'd say you'd probably look quite good in that corset. (I won't ask about the wig.)

[tehta.livejournal.com]

I like wigs. I own several. Sometimes I wear them to parties.

[dragonlady7.livejournal.com]

I don't think I've ever worn a wig.
No, I take it back-- when I was really little we had two cheap old wigs, one gray and one black, short and loosely curled. Someone said we looked like Tina Turner with the black wig on, and we didn't know who she was, except that she was a singer. So we would pretend to be her, only we didn't know any of her songs.
The other wig, we'd put on and pretend to be Grandma.
Not that we'd put them on properly, mind you. We'd just put them on like hats, on top of our long blond fringe-cut little girl hair.

But I haven't seen either of those wigs in about twenty years now, so I dunno. Is it hard to get a wig to stay on? Some of my coworkers wear them, but I can never tell because they're boring wigs. (Except one who pulled her hat off and her hair came with it, and the manager nearly had a heart attack because he'd never imagined that wasn't her real hair, and she was almost bald underneath. That, I could definitely see the amusement value in.)

[tehta.livejournal.com]

You can use bobby-pins to get the wig to stay on. But in my case nothing very exciting happens when the wig falls off, anyway.

[dragonlady7.livejournal.com]

I suppose if you really wanted to mess with people you could put yet another wig under the first one, so if the wig fell off they'd think you'd done something foolish to your real hair.
But that would be cumbersome and rather ridiculous. (I suppose the logical solution would be to actually do something foolish to your real hair, but that's a bit drastic just to get a reaction. Oh wait, thousands of teenagers do it for just that reason... Well, yet another reason not to, I suppose.)

I guess it would be kind of neat to just... not be a blonde once in a while. I've never so much as dyed my hair, given that it's the only aspect of me that I'm ever complimented on and so I feel like I really shouldn't screw it up. I almost dyed it purple in high school but then chickened out, largely because my mother was more into the idea of doing it than I was.

Hmm... It's thin enough that I could put it up under a wig and it would never show...
I should get a wig and be a redhead and see what it's like. I was born a redhead and have always kind of wanted to be one since.

[spacellama.livejournal.com]

Yay for large boobs! I am similarly cursed endowed. Of course, being 5 ft tall, I suspect I look like a mop of hair, with boobs, on pudgy stilt-like things.

If you buy, please take pics. You're right: you would make very hot gothgirl.

Oddly geeky side note: I personally find Neil Gaiman refreshingly hot also, in that uber geeky sci-fi writer hunky sort of way.

[dragonlady7.livejournal.com]

Boobies.... You know, I'm really fond of mine, but I know fine well I'd probably be more attractive without them, on a normal daily basis. But once in a while I get them out just because I got 'em, and they're awfully comforting at times like that. I wish I had more outfits in which I could Get The Girls Out, y'know? Hence the adulthood-long desire for a leather corset.

I have quite thin hair and am a bit stubby-legged as well, so I haven't exactly got A Look going on. I don't think I could actually carry off the look of the Buckles Monstrosity. But still. I would love to find someplace that carried these sorts of things and try them on just to know for sure whether they'd suit me. Because they just might and that would be awesome.
(My party-pooper boyfriend pointed out that the corset is actually kind of ugly and wouldn't suit me, but I really haven't been able to find it in myself to thank him for that astute observation. He really doesn't seem to get what I'm going for, here.)

And yes, Neil Gaiman is totally hot. I have a dork fetish and I am not ashamed of it. I've posted pictures (http://www.bridget.kelly.name/Pictures/DaveMonkeyComputer.jpg) of the wonderboy I'm dating: He's totally hot, if you like your men 70 pounds underweight and passionate about XML. In my worldview, Gaiman's totally like a supermodel or something. (He recently did a post in his blog that was just a bunch of photos of himself from a recent photo shoot, because people asked for them.)

[p54ch0p9th.livejournal.com]

personally find Neil Gaiman refreshingly hot also, in that uber geeky sci-fi writer hunky sort of way.

Yeah, I saw his photo on the inside of the cover of Coraline, and I was like, to my friend, "Hey, he's hot. May I borrow this book?"

[dragonlady7.livejournal.com]

And he's all innocent about being hot, too. Which only makes it better. Mmm.

[silverwerecat.livejournal.com]

That's absolutely gorgeous! No way I could fit into it, though. :)

[dragonlady7.livejournal.com]

They make it in sizes from XS to 7X, so you probably could, it's just a question of whether the result would be what you would desire. That particular auction just happened to be for one in my size, but the seller does offer a wide range of sizes. :)

So, tallying the results from these comments, it seems that everyone I know except my boyfriend agrees that it's purdy.
Eh well.

[p54ch0p9th.livejournal.com]

Maybe he's scared that it'll make you irresistible and so attract the unwelcome attention of other men? Imagine wearing it at work!

[dragonlady7.livejournal.com]

He's not very territorial, so I doubt it.

wearing it at work

Given that I work in an airport and thus have to get through the metal detector at the beginning of every shift, imagining wearing it at work entails imagining getting naked before the entire Transport Security Authority staff along with the Niagara Frontier Transit Authority staff and probably not only most of my coworkers and supervisors but also several hundred travellers. "Hey! It's my boobs!"

So, I'll file that one under Bad Ideas.
Maybe that's why it appeals to me so much...
But not to wear to work.