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dragonlady7couldn't sleep.
finally slept less than 3 hours ago.
WHY?
I dunno. Have a big old headache and feel fragile, as is to be expected.
Am about to commence another Kamikaze Tuesday and am not feeling capable of five, much less fifteen hours.
Caught a glimpse out the window of the snow, and thought "Whoa! Close the airport, snow!" But there's less than an inch on the ground. And if I wanted, i could call in sick. But I can't afford to.
Man...
Today is going to suck.
Also, just got my first honest review of a chapter confirming my suspicions that while several have liked it, not everybody's going to. Some people are going to wholeheartedly agree with me when I say the opening might be a little boring. Swell.
I do not have the strength to deal with this now, so I am going to sit on the couch with my morning tea and pout like a n00b fanfiction author. Not everyone loves my masterwork? Crap, my life is over.
I didn't wake with this song in my head, but at some point before I got out of the shower I had a full-fledged concert of Ani DiFranco's "The Diner" in my head.
how are you?
I think you're the least fucked-up
person I've ever met
and that may be as close to the real thing
as I'm ever gonna get
Not particularly applicable to my life at the moment, but it's better than some of the monstrosities I've had stuck in my head for an entire morning of work.
Fuck, I have to leave in fifteen minutes and all I want to do is go fetal in the corner. It'll be dead today, sure, but all that means is that I will have uncrowded breakdowns and come home poor, instead of the manic breakdowns of days of yore back when I had customers.
If I don't break $100, in two seven-plus-hour shifts, I will come home and cry.
If I'm lucky, that's the only time I'll cry today.
Not wearing mascara today, no no no.
Never finished Ch. 4 yesterday, and that's the harshest thing about all this not-sleeping-- it's not productive, it's not me getting a ton of writing done. It's me sitting and worrying about things I can't change. And at this point I'm not feeling up to writing at all. I can't get through all this shit. I can't work all these hours and still focus. I'm a scatterbrained twit, I'll never be able to focus on any one thing long enough to finish it-- but not working doesn't help that-- and besides that, all my suspicions about the fucking thing are likely true. Wheeeeee!!!! Unreadable! And I'm a shite bartender too!!
Oop, gotta leave in ten minutes. Best get into my so-sexy uniform so I can look... Competent? Not hardly.
finally slept less than 3 hours ago.
WHY?
I dunno. Have a big old headache and feel fragile, as is to be expected.
Am about to commence another Kamikaze Tuesday and am not feeling capable of five, much less fifteen hours.
Caught a glimpse out the window of the snow, and thought "Whoa! Close the airport, snow!" But there's less than an inch on the ground. And if I wanted, i could call in sick. But I can't afford to.
Man...
Today is going to suck.
Also, just got my first honest review of a chapter confirming my suspicions that while several have liked it, not everybody's going to. Some people are going to wholeheartedly agree with me when I say the opening might be a little boring. Swell.
I do not have the strength to deal with this now, so I am going to sit on the couch with my morning tea and pout like a n00b fanfiction author. Not everyone loves my masterwork? Crap, my life is over.
I didn't wake with this song in my head, but at some point before I got out of the shower I had a full-fledged concert of Ani DiFranco's "The Diner" in my head.
how are you?
I think you're the least fucked-up
person I've ever met
and that may be as close to the real thing
as I'm ever gonna get
Not particularly applicable to my life at the moment, but it's better than some of the monstrosities I've had stuck in my head for an entire morning of work.
Fuck, I have to leave in fifteen minutes and all I want to do is go fetal in the corner. It'll be dead today, sure, but all that means is that I will have uncrowded breakdowns and come home poor, instead of the manic breakdowns of days of yore back when I had customers.
If I don't break $100, in two seven-plus-hour shifts, I will come home and cry.
If I'm lucky, that's the only time I'll cry today.
Not wearing mascara today, no no no.
Never finished Ch. 4 yesterday, and that's the harshest thing about all this not-sleeping-- it's not productive, it's not me getting a ton of writing done. It's me sitting and worrying about things I can't change. And at this point I'm not feeling up to writing at all. I can't get through all this shit. I can't work all these hours and still focus. I'm a scatterbrained twit, I'll never be able to focus on any one thing long enough to finish it-- but not working doesn't help that-- and besides that, all my suspicions about the fucking thing are likely true. Wheeeeee!!!! Unreadable! And I'm a shite bartender too!!
Oop, gotta leave in ten minutes. Best get into my so-sexy uniform so I can look... Competent? Not hardly.
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no subject
Date: 2005-01-11 07:00 pm (UTC)Who told you that? Unreadable? I'm v. confused now.
no subject
Date: 2005-01-11 08:56 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-01-11 10:24 pm (UTC)I'm reading chapter 2 tonight, by the way. :p
no subject
Date: 2005-01-11 10:42 pm (UTC)I agree...I'm enjoying it immensely just the way it is, and personally, I'd be disappointed if you changed now.
I'd take the criticism with a grain of salt...and a slice of lemon and a shot of Cuervo. But that's just my humble opinion. =D
no subject
Date: 2005-01-11 11:20 pm (UTC)Hahahahahahaha! YESSS!!
no subject
Date: 2005-01-12 11:37 pm (UTC)No, now that I go back and read (I read it hastily after little sleep), she was suggesting that I make the opening snappier because the mail-opener at a publishing company would throw it out after the first couple paragraphs.
It was an email, not a comment. So I suppose I should reply. I just don't have the strength at the moment.
It's important to recognize that everyone's opinions differ, and everyone's opinions are valid, and I still think the opening needs some work. But it always needs work. I think I'll work on the voice a little bit. The heroine is progressing but she is still not entirely sympathetic. And I have to not be afraid to put in as much work on this novel as it needs. I wrote the thing in 30 days, and that means it's nothing like done despite having a complete framework. :)
In the meantime... what a coincidence. I have right here a half-empty bottle of Cuervo. And... why, look at this! I have not one but six fresh limes! What on earth can that mean?
It must be Fate, speaking to me.
Heh, I also don't have to be at work until 4pm tomorrow...