This is fun!
Reblog with your poor explanation!
I enter codes so that dudes with hammers can have help when they’re sick or old.
I break your electric stuff when you don’t want it no more.
I tap very loudly on my keyboard so insurance vendors can fight each other for big-ass client business.
Three different sets of people yell at me about three separate things they want implemented. I then yell at a different set of people to do what the other people want done. Then I travel to the place to make sure the people I yelled at did what I told them to so I don’t get yelled at again.
I make my money from a company who makes its money by taking the money earned by people who trust them with their money. I also run reports on who makes more money and where they put it. Money.
I run a team that makes people online feel like they need to click things for information. I then force them to consume extra things that they don’t want. I also spend a lot of time trying to not piss off very rich public figures with giant egos.
I use computers and mathematical equations that don’t make any sense to figure out how few people are needed to do a job so as little money is spent as possible
[♫ that’s the technology-being-use-to-exploit-workers-
under-the-guise-of-efficiency raaaaagggg ♫]
I use my extensive knowledge of a particular product to put outdated system admins out of work
[♫ that’s the i’m-going-to-be-the-first-against-the-
wall-when-the-proletariat-rises raaaaaag ♫]
(sorry for ripping you off david)
(sorry not sorry)
I encourage adults who act like children to act like adults.
I try to make online services make sense to mostly men who sell things really fast (currebt project).
I tell people where books are.
I make sure the machines that give off particles that might give you cancer give off the right amount of particles. Also I know how magnets work?
I put dirty books and movies/CDs into piles. If they are very dirty or broken, I put them in a special pile of shame. I’m in grad school so I can take the piles of dirty books and give them to other people.
People who are bad with computers call me.
I stalk the wealthy.
I stare at plants, and also give presentations about how people don’t stare at plants right.
i wave a little plastic stick around at a magic square for a couple hours a day. this makes some people very happy and other people very mad. if i make more people happy than mad, i can keep having food and a home.
People yell at me when things are broken and I send people out to fix the broken things. Sometimes the people I send can’t or won’t fix the things so I have to send other people.
I make facsimile humans so real people can shoot at them, then brag about how many they shot.
Using the magic of various Adobe products, I do the work of three people, faster than I ought, for less money than I should, for a company that is its own worst enemy.
I stack food on top of other kinds of food on top of plates, then move the stacks from one part of a room to another part of the room. Sometimes I wrap the stacks in paper and then put them in bags and then in boxes and then move them to another part of the room. Other times, I teach other humans to do all the stacking and moving the right way.
I teach people how to write the good kind of metaposts. Only all the fandoms are 600+ years old.
Other times I try to figure out how interrelated canon texts relate to each other, when all the metadata is missing, and then I write long boring meta about it.
Sometimes I reverse-stuff poultry, and sometimes I change numbers on the Internet to other numbers.