That side of depression
Jul. 11th, 2016 08:03 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dragonlady7via http://ift.tt/29zA0HK:
creativeronica:
depressedgirl83:
Why do people never talk about the part of depression when you just don’t want anything anymore? Everybody talks about when it hurts like hell, when you cry, when you cut, when you take drugs, when you break down. But no one ever talks about when you just lay down in your room, with a hole inside of you that you don’t know how to fill, and you don’t want to do anything even the things you usually like. So you just spend your day kinda waiting for it to end. And it’s horrible because you feel empty and guilty for that at the same time.
There needs to be more awareness of this kind of depressed state. It’s often the kind that is mistaken for laziness. I call it “A” depression, and I know it personally. The symptoms are apathy and anhedonia:
Apathy (lack of interest, enthusiasm, or concern and anhedonia ( the inability to experience pleasure from activities usually found enjoyable).
This one *is* really hard to explain. People think you don’t like them anymore. You can’t remember what really liking anything was actually like. You get excited if you crave something, and then when you get the thing, and you don’t enjoy it, it makes you feel twice as broken.
I mostly don’t get sad-depression; I used to occasionally, and I’d cry and wallow and it was kind of indulgent really. Now I just get irritated and numb.
It’s just *boring*, and unrelenting. Ugh.
Then throw in some anxiety, and it’s a perfect shitstorm of annoying nothingness. The literal only emotion you have is this half-assed certainty of disaster.
It’s a recipe for perfect immobility, is what it is.
creativeronica:
depressedgirl83:
Why do people never talk about the part of depression when you just don’t want anything anymore? Everybody talks about when it hurts like hell, when you cry, when you cut, when you take drugs, when you break down. But no one ever talks about when you just lay down in your room, with a hole inside of you that you don’t know how to fill, and you don’t want to do anything even the things you usually like. So you just spend your day kinda waiting for it to end. And it’s horrible because you feel empty and guilty for that at the same time.
There needs to be more awareness of this kind of depressed state. It’s often the kind that is mistaken for laziness. I call it “A” depression, and I know it personally. The symptoms are apathy and anhedonia:
Apathy (lack of interest, enthusiasm, or concern and anhedonia ( the inability to experience pleasure from activities usually found enjoyable).
This one *is* really hard to explain. People think you don’t like them anymore. You can’t remember what really liking anything was actually like. You get excited if you crave something, and then when you get the thing, and you don’t enjoy it, it makes you feel twice as broken.
I mostly don’t get sad-depression; I used to occasionally, and I’d cry and wallow and it was kind of indulgent really. Now I just get irritated and numb.
It’s just *boring*, and unrelenting. Ugh.
Then throw in some anxiety, and it’s a perfect shitstorm of annoying nothingness. The literal only emotion you have is this half-assed certainty of disaster.
It’s a recipe for perfect immobility, is what it is.
