dragonlady7

witcher

via https://ift.tt/3vbFsbR

So this isn’t a proper Wee Precious Flower Prince writeup because I just can’t muster the concentration for those anymore but we did do some Witchering at MM and DF’s house this weekend– it started off with me asking DF how many units of fisstech he had in his stash, since he’d decided he was going to always collect it and never drop or sell it, and there’s nothing else you can do with it so he just keeps it in his stash. So DF booted up the Xbox just to go check his stash, but then once he had booted it up he realized Geralt was all dressed up for a party, and he wanted to go to the party, so–

anyway. My dude was mildly inwardly distressed to realize that he absolutely knew where the stash location is in Novigrad, because he often watches some_stars https://tmblr.co/m0l4iDjxkB7VuWm6d1vXtOQ stream with me. “And Dandelion is just standing there like a weirdo always in exactly the same place….”

Twenty-two units of fisstech, is what DF has in his stash, by the way.

Anyway DF killed Geralt several times by piloting him off cliffs, off embankments, off smallish rises. “Is there a potion that reduces fall damage?” he asked, and MM, innocently, Googled that, and was like “oh boy” and he was like “what” and she was like “well a lot of people on the Internet are frustrated with how easily Geralt takes fall damage”

to put it mildly

“Oh come on,” DF said, as Geralt died tripping down an embankment, “a standard human could have survived that! Like, I mean, he’d’ve been paying me a visit, after, but–”

“I guess you would have some insight into standard human injuries,” I said, in an understatement. (It’s a while since DF worked an ER rotation, but he used to do them very regularly up until like, maybe a couple of years ago? He only sees the cases that require surgery, as he’s an anaesthesiologist, but that does give you a good idea of what sort of severe injuries one frequently sees.)

“I’ll tell you what I know,” he said, as the game loaded up, “never ever go onto your roof.”

Good life lesson.

As a hilarious capper to this, towards the end of the evening, DF piloted Geralt into a courtyard and then realized he couldn’t hop the other wall to use it as a shortcut. He’d jumped up onto a bench, but then realized he couldn’t make the jump the rest of the way over the wall, so he turned around and hopped down off the bench.

And took fall damage. It wasn’t a lot, but it was a little sliver off the end of his health bar.

“What the shit was that,” DF said, as I howled in laughter. (Your picture was not posted)