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dragonlady7I developed an allergy to sulfa antibiotics, 9 days into a 10-day course of them.
I’m covered head to toe in hives. Now I’m on mega antihistamines and a steroid to suppress my immune system etc., and the hives are mostly not itchy anymore. (Mostly. Ow.)
But I’m still covered in spots. They’ve faded from bright magenta to a dull purple, but they’re still very visible, everywhere. I’m lucky in that on my face and chest, they’ve mostly turned red and blended together; I just look sunburnt. But on paler areas of my body, they’re really blotchy and ugly-looking.
It’s amazing what a number it can do to you, being disfigured like that– it shouldn’t be any big deal, they’ll fade and go away. But I’m sooo horribly self-conscious. It gives me a lot more respect, let me tell you, for people who have more permanent marks or discolorations or disfigurations, who still manage to go about their lives normally and wear normal clothes and damn the haters. Even though this is temporary for me (I hope!!) it’s hard, it’s so hard. It’s a really powerful reminder of the profound amount of privilege inherent in looking normal, for whatever value of “normal” you can ever think of, and even some you can’t.
I’m covered head to toe in hives. Now I’m on mega antihistamines and a steroid to suppress my immune system etc., and the hives are mostly not itchy anymore. (Mostly. Ow.)
But I’m still covered in spots. They’ve faded from bright magenta to a dull purple, but they’re still very visible, everywhere. I’m lucky in that on my face and chest, they’ve mostly turned red and blended together; I just look sunburnt. But on paler areas of my body, they’re really blotchy and ugly-looking.
It’s amazing what a number it can do to you, being disfigured like that– it shouldn’t be any big deal, they’ll fade and go away. But I’m sooo horribly self-conscious. It gives me a lot more respect, let me tell you, for people who have more permanent marks or discolorations or disfigurations, who still manage to go about their lives normally and wear normal clothes and damn the haters. Even though this is temporary for me (I hope!!) it’s hard, it’s so hard. It’s a really powerful reminder of the profound amount of privilege inherent in looking normal, for whatever value of “normal” you can ever think of, and even some you can’t.
