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dragonlady7via http://ift.tt/1X8KwG2:
felren13:
atlantisrises:
bomberqueen17:
Dove chocolates always have really weird slogans in them. I’m not sure what they’re thinking with this one. But it worked if they were trying to cheer me up. Hmm… I think my favorite quote of my father’s, that comes easily to mind anyway, is “I’ve never killed anybody that didn’t need killing.” That’s a good one. Anyone else got a good one?
“Well I’m not planning to die anytime soon”
my dad told me once, “you are good dragon spawn”
This has been fascinating across platforms, because most people’s dads are the Dad Jokes kind of dad, and that is very much not my experience. In my life, Mom is the one who makes corny jokes.
Dad is not one hundred percent sure how your “jokes” function and is where I have inherited my awesome ability to take any joke way too seriously and suck the joy out by analyzing it, which I tend to view as a form of humor in itself.
Dad was dead fucking serious. He has only ever killed one person and it was in combat. He is proud not of this, but of never having killed anyone else. (“I’ve been tempted,” he says seriously, and then lists some examples. Thanks, Dad.)
felren13:
atlantisrises:
bomberqueen17:
Dove chocolates always have really weird slogans in them. I’m not sure what they’re thinking with this one. But it worked if they were trying to cheer me up. Hmm… I think my favorite quote of my father’s, that comes easily to mind anyway, is “I’ve never killed anybody that didn’t need killing.” That’s a good one. Anyone else got a good one?
“Well I’m not planning to die anytime soon”
my dad told me once, “you are good dragon spawn”
This has been fascinating across platforms, because most people’s dads are the Dad Jokes kind of dad, and that is very much not my experience. In my life, Mom is the one who makes corny jokes.
Dad is not one hundred percent sure how your “jokes” function and is where I have inherited my awesome ability to take any joke way too seriously and suck the joy out by analyzing it, which I tend to view as a form of humor in itself.
Dad was dead fucking serious. He has only ever killed one person and it was in combat. He is proud not of this, but of never having killed anyone else. (“I’ve been tempted,” he says seriously, and then lists some examples. Thanks, Dad.)
no subject
Date: 2016-04-03 11:39 pm (UTC)My most memorable one was, "Inspire the life of a child." Which... I know what you meant, chocolate, but that was not what you said. What you said was, 'Something about your should incite people to have unprotected sex.' That was, uh, not exactly what I wanted to think about while trying to enjoy a piece of delicious chocolate.
no subject
Date: 2016-04-03 11:55 pm (UTC)My little sister wrote a bunch of fortune-cookie-style little slips of paper and mixed them in with my chocolates, so I occasionally pull one out and they are hilarious pastiches of the Dove mottos.
Sometimes she'll text me live updates of the slogans she gets in a day. Most of them boil down to "GET YOURSELF FIRED"-- like "hit snooze x5!" what the fuck. I have to be at work at a time for a reason, Dove.
no subject
Date: 2016-04-04 12:18 am (UTC)Of course, I do typically hit snooze 5x, but that's something I've budgeted the time for. :D