Mar. 11th, 2018

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So yesterday Dude said to me, “What’s Council Rock?”

“I don’t know,” I said. I Googled it. A school district in Pennsylvania. A brewery somewhere. I shrugged. 

“You have a Google Calendar event that just says ‘Council Rock’ at 9am tomorrow,” he said.

“I don’t know,” I said. Other people have access to my Calendar. My sister, and my best friend. Sometimes one or the other of them schedules things on my calendar by accident. 

This morning the notification popped up. “Council Rock,” it said. No further information. Baffled, I sent a text to my sister. “Did you accidentally put something on my calendar?” I asked her.

She wrote back, “I asked you about that and you put it there, some joke you had with Farmbaby. Don’t you remember? Something about the Jungle Book?”

I’ve never read the Jungle Book. … I have no memory of this.

I had had a vague thought that it was related to the Lion King or something, and had expected that to come up when I Googled it, so was that the shadow of a memory of it, or something? I don’t know? I have in the past had Farmbaby try to take over my computer so I’ll do something with her like… type a thing, or … I guess make a Calendar event, but… I really genuinely truly have zero recollection of this whatsoever.

Am I going senile? Probably.
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oh in other possibly related news i managed to forget Chris Evans’s whole name today. For like, a conversationally significant time. It was kind of a weird mix of horrifying and pleasant. I was like, you know, the captain guy, with the same first name as all the other white dudes, and I was like, a perfect total blank. Uhh the guy. The guy? With the face. And the abs. You know. The guy.

My dude did not, in fact, know the guy. He’s usually pretty good at dealing with my brain farts but since it’s a topic he has less than zero interest in, he didn’t have a lot to go on.

Chris, I finally said. They’re all Chrises. One of the Chrises. Not the Thor one. You know!

Oh, he said. Yeah. I know. The guy. 

Yeah, I said. That one. Anyway. What were we talking about?

I don’t know, he said, and we moved on. 
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ineptshieldmaid:

brandoncarlo:

csykora:

brandoncarlo:

Hockey players have weird af ankles

Unnecessary answer hour returns! 

This is in fact true. 

There are two bones in your lower leg. One’s big and buff and one’s pretty wimpy. When you walk, that big tibia takes ~80% of your weight of impact, and the fibula only has to take the remaining 20%. 

But skaters place their weight differently over their feet. In principle a hockey player has 100% of their weight shifted forward onto their tibia. 

You can actually see the implications of this in practice. If you break your fibula, 20% of the weight-bearing is gone, and you won’t really be able to walk. But a hockey player who cracks their fibula can and will keep skating almost without noticing something’s wrong. This happens pretty damn often when they block shots. You’ll see them skate easily over to get checked out, step up onto the hallway floor, and then suddenly slump over, with medical staff helping them limp off down the hallway.

 I hear people saying, “oh, guess he’s fine!” when hockey players get up and appear to be skating okay: nah. And when a player wants to return to the ice: they may genuinely feel better skating but be too injured to walk. 

And over time, if you’re in the weight-bearing position for skating more often than walking, and are skating from a young age, yes, that affects the shape of your weight-bearing bones and external appearance of your legs and feet. I don’t have a survey on hockey players’ shapely ankles compared to the normal population in front of me at the moment, but every single skater I see could be identified by their ankles

I thought this was going to be someone condescendingly explaining hockey to me but this is so informative and well written and I trust you with all my bones now.

Huh. Okay then, question for tumblr: given that figure skates and hockey skates are differently structured, does this also happen to figure skaters?

@fahye? You know about anatomy and also skating.

I’m also wondering about roller skates as opposed to ice skates. It seems to me that you carry your weight similarly on any kind of ice skate, but roller skates have so much broader an edge– because instead of just the two edges of your blade, you have the inside and outside edges of two pairs of wheels, which is quite a broad surface– but I don’t know much of the details. I will say, though, that nine years of roller derby gave me some literal insights into the bones of the leg… I witnessed three spiral tib-fib fractures, one with some impressive displacement, so. (Not bad for nine years, really, and my own career-ending injury [BOTH ankles] took place on a staircase when I skipped practice, so.)

I have definitely experienced that locomotion on skates and off them is so significantly different that there have been times when I was fine on foot, laced up skates and couldn’t move– but many more times when I was in some pain on foot, but decided to push through it on skates, found I could skate just fine, got back off skates and was basically dead. Not just ankle issues, but also some lower back and hip issues. 

The reason hockey players have asses like that is that in order to stay balanced you basically have to constantly engage your entire lower back and ass at all times. 

But I Did Not Know That about the fibula and weird ankles. 
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prokopetz:

To be fair, I suspect that Millennials failing to figure out they were being scammed until after they’d been lumbered with trillions of dollars of educational debt and spent a decade being suckered into abusive dead-end jobs while Gen Z got a clue while they’re still in middle school has less to do with Millennials being dumbasses or Gen Z being geniuses and more to do with the fact that the powers that be have stopped bothering to pretend that they’re not literal Captain Planet villains.
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tsunflowers:

if I could change one thing about the way my sexuality is portrayed in the media so that future bi kids could have it easier it would be to eliminate the idea that bisexuality is necessarily all about sex. this is a stereotype for all non-straight people to be sure, but the representation of bisexuality as being sex-driven was what impacted me the most. I was able to find books by gay authors that fought against the stereotypes and showed gay and lesbian romantic love being more important than just sex, but even in those books I didn’t see the same for bisexuals. when I was twelve I was able to recognize that I had the same crush feelings for boys and girls, and I knew the word bisexual, but I wasn’t able to apply it to myself bc I was twelve and didn’t feel sexual attraction yet. what I got from the media I consumed was that straight love was the norm, gay love was difficult but beautiful, and bi love was irrelevant. people were only bi bc they liked to sleep around. if they fell in love with someone they would become aligned with gay or straight values and cease to be bi

but you know you can be bi in and out of a relationship. you can be bi and have sex and you can be bi and not. you can be fundamentally, intrinsically bi. and you can realize that at any time, from childhood to the day you die
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I… have a feeling this textbook’s age may be showing and that this is no longer the case, but… maybe I’ll just roll with this, no one will be able to understand me anyway. Здравствуйте, товарищи!
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For a jeans-top cut-off skirt, I already ruled out rayon (I have a whole bunch of rayon challis I got in the “stained and flawed” discount bin that needs dyeing but is usable), and I said i’d use cotton but really linen would probably work beautifully? Linen has a substantial hand, and if hemmed really well, holds up pretty well to washing and wouldn’t get destroyed by the denim. (I’m worried about the heavy weight denim top crashing around in a washing machine and beating the hell out of whatever fabric I sew onto it, because I’ve made garments for my sister before and she Does Not use the gentle cycle or separate her laundry At All.)

I have a bunch of linen. It’s one of those fabrics, though– either you iron it, or you don’t, and either you love it or you hate it. I like the look of unironed linen, but sometimes I iron it– Dude has a linen shirt that he loves but the way he cares for his clothing, he looks like an unmade bed when he wears it, so every time I wash it, I have to tumble dry it and hang it damp so it doesn’t look completely terrible, and even still sometimes I have to get the iron out and fix the fucking collar and cuffs and button placket because they’ve decided that they need to be twisted into unrecognizable shapes forever, it’s amazing. (The same undesirable crease will not only persist the entire time dude is wearing it, but also through the wash cycle into the next time he wears it, so. It’s astonishing how determined this shirt is to make him look like a bum.)

I love linen but I completely understand why people hate it. It’s awesome against your skin– it is never damp and it never clings, it’s phenomenal as a blanket or upholstery fabric because it’s neither warm nor cool, it’s perfectly temperature-neutral. But it really has no business in outerwear; it looks phenomenal freshly-pressed and then you sit down and it’s got permanent creases where your hips bend for the rest of time and they won’t even come out in the wash it’s fucking ridiculous. 

It does drape really interestingly, though, in the looser portions of a garment. So it wouldn’t be atrocious in a skirt. But. My sister’s other thing is that she never tumble-dries anything and so sometimes things get hung to dry on a cold damp day and let me tell you the hardest surface known to man is the wrinkles that denim acquires when hung out to dry slowly on a cold damp wind-free day. Those jeans stand up on their own and hurt to put on. 

I still wistfully want to go buy some quilter’s cotton in a cute pattern but Dude was like “don’t you own fabric” and I was like “i can’t actually argue with that” so. Maybe we’ll just see if linen works. 

Now i want a skirt for me. :/ I don’t know why I feel like I can only sew for other people. 
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walburgablack replied to your post “For a jeans-top cut-off skirt, I already ruled out rayon (I have a…”

oooooh, linen saris drape beautifully, especially if you can pull off artfully/intentionally disheveled, so this should be gorgeous.

My first snag so far is that the piece of linen I was thinking of is almost the same color as the denim, which on the one hand seems like it would be great, but on the other hand, the point is that it’s a skirt made of two different fabrics so it’s probably not what Farmsister had in mind. On the first hand again, though, maybe it’s a sign that I need to go ahead and make myself a skirt with that piece, after all. But I have to keep looking for suitable fabric for Sister’s skirt.

I have never seen a linen sari and that sounds amazing. I know precious little about saris, though, so it’s hardly surprising that I’ve only seen them in silk or cotton. (And, here, the stuff they sell expensively in fabric stores as “sari fabric” is exclusively polyester.) (Everything in fabric stores is unreasonably expensive, though.)
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walburgablack replied to your post “walburgablack replied to your post “For a jeans-top cut-off skirt, I…”

linen saris sell for somewhere between thirty-eight and forty-six dollars depending on thread count, so, uh. I mean, they aren’t cheap, certainly. But I do see how that would be different in Troy. But ugh synthetic is so bad for a sari, though ofc a lot of what gets used for daily wear is synthetic.

A lot of clothing here is billed as “linen” but if you really look at it, it’s a cellulose fiber (plant-derived, but chemically processed) marketed under the name Tencel. Which is a rayon, technically, and while it’s not synthetic, it’s also not linen. The point of linen is that it’s made straight from plant fibers, and cellulose is made by chemically processing the plants into a kind of slurry and then forcing them through holes to extrude fibers. Which is fine, I’m not judging, it just means they’re not at all the same thing. 

Fabric is sold as a finished good, at retail markup, as opposed to as a raw material. So you’ll pay more for the yardage to make a garment than you would if you just bought it ready-to-wear. Linen, actual linen, at its very cheapest (no choice of colors/patterns/weight) is around $8 per yard, and you need three yards to make a skirt. (A more typical price is $12-20/yd.)

Ugh I made the mistake of Googling linen saris and I think I have to go lie down. OMG those are so beautiful. Why did I look? I should not have looked. 

Anyway I’m on an official hiatus from buying fabric until I go through stuff I have, and most of what I have is existing garments I need to cut up and reuse, so. I need to do that. *closes browser tabs*

As it happens, I just discovered an old skirt that I meant to cut up and make into something else, and it would be perfect as part of a jeans refashion– very similar to the aesthetic of the one my sister sent me as an example– so I’m going to deluxe it up by putting a lining underneath (it’s an old cotton gauze broomstick skirt, so it could be more substantial) but I’m not going to get any fancier than that. Except I think I’ll add a band of lace to cover the seam where it joins to the jeans, because I think that would look cute and I own the lace already. So. Progress, I guess. And I didn’t buy anything.
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walburgablack replied to your post “walburgablack replied to your post “walburgablack replied to your…”

kurta quilts? like… okay I’m confused now, because a kurta is an article of clothing, not a specific fabric or even family of fabrics so, uh, what? otoh, I know about linen saris, ohman, especially now cause my mum’s started selling them and I just want to take away her whole stock. I am super excited about your tailoring project, too, because I can only do tiny embroidery, so anything substantial and practical feels really amazing to me. <3

I had to Google around for it, because I was confused too– a kurta is like, a tunic-shirt kinda garment, right?– and apparently by “kurta quilt” they mean a patchwork quilt made, supposedly, out of old worn-out kurtas, which sounds kind of amazing actually. I love patchwork especially when you’re working with patterned fabrics and i have so little of that in my stash that I’m extremely envious of it whenever I see it. 

Oh my goodness I don’t know what I’d do if anyone in my family sold textile goods. Roll around in them when nobody’s looking probably. Ungh. 

I’m still sort of awful at sewing, in that I can’t follow a pattern to save myself, but I can absolutely join two pieces of fabric together reliably, and if I stick to things that I know the shape of, I do all right. But what I really love to do is hand-sewing, and that’s so time-consuming it’s almost not worth beginning because there’s never time to complete it. 

I feel particularly drawn to linen because that was one of the biggest crops in the area where I was born, up until the First World War– there were textile mills in my hometown from the time of the earliest Dutch settlers, and they worked both linen and wool, and the linen was grown all over the county including on the farm my sister now owns. And it’s completely vanished now, no one remembers it, there are no traces of it, except that I found a pair of flax hetchels in one of the old barns on the farm. I want to grow it, but that’s such a Process and it won’t be profitable so there’s no time. Alas.
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Quick and Easy Bread Bowls:

I’m taking it to another level today by trying this out. I’ve halved this recipe, which was sort of A Lot (7 cups of flour no way man) and also reduced the amount of yeast in it because it seemed like a lot, so I’m going to let it rise longer, and this may be that obnoxious thing where someone’s just making something that has nothing whatsoever to do with the original recipe but I just haven’t settled on what bread recipe I like to use ok, so give me a break. Also I still haven’t bought bread flour because last time I did it meant I never baked bread again, so. This is going to turn out just fine except horrible in some way, like all my experiments. I have a tiny kitchen I don’t have room for every kind of flour. 

It’s going to have pot roast in it, a venison pot roast that’s been marinating in a Joy of Cooking marinade recipe for 24 hours, so. We’ll just see how that goes.

Oh I never did write up my last week of codependent recipes. Maybe I’ll do that at some point. Want to know how to eat one chicken for a whole week? I got deets. 
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amaliabones:

you ever start rereading your WIP to get in the mood and write more and you get so caught up that when you get to the end you’re like “bitch? where’s the rest?” and you realize you’re the bitch and you have to write it
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So here’s how I ate last week, starting with a chicken I got from the farm. With recipes/techniques! I meant there to be photos of all of the stages but I dunno if I succeeded.

I wish I could eat like this all the time. I don’t usually have the attention span. But here’s a look into it; my sister manages to eat like this regularly, though not normally in quite so immediate or organized a fashion– she just spontaneously comes up with this kind of leftovers-remixing off the top of her head. Me, I gotta plan it all out in advance. The key, I think, for me, is having stuff pre-prepped while I’m doing something else. I’d never make butternut squash soup, for example, if I had to start out by roasting it that night. But leftovers are key for this kind of thing.

1) Roast Chicken In Milk. I used Jamie Oliver’s recipe, covered it for half of the cooking time and then left it uncovered the other half. I have a great little cast iron Dutch oven my mother literally mailed to me, that was my grandmother’s, and it fits a chicken sort of snugly and is perfect. As side dishes, I: a) roasted a largeish butternut squash, cut in half, face-down in a metal baking pan with 1/4″ of water in it roasted for like, 45-60min at whatever temp the chicken is, and b) made a big casserole dish of macaroni and cheese. I have a recipe memorized for that, but if you need one, well, this is the original recipe my mom gave me, but I often brown a diced half an onion in the butter before I add the flour, for a more complex dish.

I made a pan sauce as I let the chicken rest by whisking some flour (not much) into the Dutch oven and all the stuff in it. There might be a note on that in the original recipe. Carved the chicken: all I served at that dinner was a breast, skin-on, for me, and a whole leg quarter for Dude, because I know that’s how much we’ll eat. I left the rest of the carcass until after dinner. Scraped out the whole butternut squash into a bowl, and only added fixins (butter and maple syrup and black pepper) to about a quarter of it. 

Immediately after dinner, I cut the other leg quarter and skin-on breast off the chicken and put it into one container. I poured the pan gravy into container 2. I stripped the chicken carcass with my fingers of all the other large bits of meat– the rib meat, the hunks of meat behind the shoulders, anything that when I dug my fingers in was soft over the bones and wasn’t just connective tissue or bone or gristle, shredded it all up smallish, and put that into container 3. I put the leftover butternut squash into container 4. And then I dumped the stripped chicken carcass back into the Dutch oven, added a stalk of celery and some carrot ends, and added enough water to cover it, and then I put that on to boil. I let it simmer for an hour or two, then left it to sit overnight because I’m a slob.

The next morning I dumped the stock through a sieve into container number 5, put it into the fridge, and threw out the bones and soggy veggie bits.

2) Chicken Parts And Rice Pilaf With Baby Spinach

I had to look up how to make a rice pilaf. It turns out it’s easy. Like, way easier than risotto, which I also make all the time but I didn’t have the right kind of rice for just now. As the fat to brown the aromatics in, I used a frozen hunk of rendered pork cracklins in lard, because I have that. You could use bacon grease if you save that, or any oil if you don’t.

So I stuck the chicken bits from container 1 in the toaster oven on a lil baking sheet at 400 for however long everything else took me, and then looked up and figured out pilaf. I used half of the stock from container number 5, and I added the baby spinach at the end while it was resting with the lid on. 

oh yeah I had a carrot in the pilaf because I wanted more vegetables. That was pretty tasty, especially since the chicken had so many seasonings on it.

The pilaf was so easy I also started bread dough. I made a recipe that calls for two separate hour-long rises, and just stuck it into the fridge for its second rise, so it could proof slowly overnight. More details on the bread, and a full disclosure about how many times I put this off, here.

3) Butternut Squash Soup and Homemade Bread

For this, all I did was use the leftover pan sauces from container number 2, a splash of the stock from container number 5, and the leftover butternut squash from container number 4. Got everything up to a boil, hit it with the immersion blender I happen to own and only use for this (you could just use a potato masher if you wanted), dumped in a little bit of whole milk to make it creamier, and then sat around waiting for the bread to finish. 

This is kind of a light dinner; you can serve cheese to go on the bread if you want a few more calories to tide you over. There’s no second vegetable or anything, you could do side dishes if you wanted. But I didn’t. 

4) Ramen With Shredded Chicken

I bought frozen ramen noodles, because our grocery store has them. I boiled them in water, meanwhile heating up the last of the chicken stock from container number 2. Once the stock was boiling, I added the shredded chicken from container number 3. When I served it, I topped it with most of the rest of the baby spinach. That’s it, that’s dinner. 

(Another thing I’d thought of doing, but didn’t, was to make quesadillas instead– warm up the chicken, slice some cheese, throw the baby spinach on top and fry big flour tortillas in a frying pan, and top it with salsa as a second vegetable. I didn’t, though– maybe this week with a different leftover meat! Just– if you don’t have ramen noodles or some other really tasty soup noodle, this is another one to do, and you can just use up the stock in the other two dishes above that take it.)

(And then, 5, I didn’t have any more chicken, but i had a little spinach left, so I used up the last of the baby spinach in omelettes on Saturday morning, with cheese left over from making the macaroni and cheese, which I had eaten every day for lunch all week. I could have kept some chicken back for this but I didn’t need to.)

So– there’s a sample of doing one whole week’s menu planning off one major protein source, and a way to end up the week without leftovers.Full disclosure– we went out to dinner once or twice in there, and had one one-off dinner that Dude made, I think it was some frozen fish filets he defrosted, pan-fried, and served over rice with steamed frozen vegetables on the side, no leftovers used or generated. So it’s not like we never eat out or only eat on-plan, but. I grew up eating like this, and various people have told me they’ve never heard of this kind of thing, so here’s a sample of how it goes when it’s going well.

So here’s the grocery list, more or less, and I apologize if I’m assuming you have stuff in your kitchen that you normally don’t, or if I’ve left anything off. 

A chicken (4.5 lbs, doesn’t really matter)onions, 3 or 4one container thing of baby spinacha butternut squash, any sizemilkcelerycarrotsfrozen ramen noodles

all the rest of these are things I keep in my kitchen:flouryeastriceassorted spices (cinnamon, salt, pepper, thyme?)butter or lard (i actually used rendered pork cracklins for the mac and cheese)pasta(optional: flour tortillas and salsa for the alternate meal)

You could customize this a lot for allergies, kosher preferences etc., and I’m working on a version now that starts off with a hunk of venison, so we’ll see how I do. Anyway. There’s that; I figured I’d write it up while I’m waiting for this week’s experimental bread to rise. 
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unicornduke:

bomberqueen17:

So here’s how I ate last week, starting with a chicken I got from the farm. With recipes/techniques! I meant there to be photos of all of the stages but I dunno if I succeeded. … No, I didn’t. Oh well.

I wish I could eat like this all the time. I don’t usually have the attention span. But here’s a look into it; my sister manages to eat like this regularly, though not normally in quite so immediate or organized a fashion– she just spontaneously comes up with this kind of leftovers-remixing off the top of her head. Me, I gotta plan it all out in advance. The key, I think, for me, is having stuff pre-prepped while I’m doing something else. I’d never make butternut squash soup, for example, if I had to start out by roasting it that night. But leftovers are key for this kind of thing.

Keep reading

That’s honestly incredible! I’m in the camp of, make one thing and it lasts me all week because if I don’t I usually can’t come up with anything other than plain rice with cheese. This is the kind of thing I want to learn to do!

I would definitely plan it all in advance, but I do that kinda anyway. I’d just have to write down what I would make each night. I don’t know how people just look at what’s in their cabinets and do stuff like this. It’s amazing.  That rice pilaf looks super good and once I get a deer, I’ll be making stock from the bones and freezing it. 

I know one of my biggest problems with recipes of all kinds is that I can’t really eat onion or garlic because it gives me heartburn (yay genetics). I can eat it once in a while, but I actually went to the co-op and they had asafoetide, which is a spice that is similar to them that I can eat. 

I’m actually going to save this so I can think about it and try some of these things. Maybe I’ll grab a chicken this weekend and try it! This is an awesome outline!

Yeah as I was writing it I was like, well, this is adapted for precisely 0 dietary issues or allergies. I don’t know what I would do without onions because they’re just what I put in literally everything, but I am certain this all could be adapted for something else. (Isn’t the co-op great? It used to be little and grubby but after like 30 years they’re finally kind of new and shiny! Farmsister goes there and never brings a bag, she just shops straight into mason jars in a crate, it’s amazing. She also belongs to an informal co-op ordering group that sells Frontier stuff and other wholesale grocery things, hit her up if you ever need, like, 8-pound pails of fair trade peanut butter or a pound of bay leaves etcetera.)

The last time we processed a pig we made stock from the bones, and it was amazing, I still have some in my freezer. The deer, this time, we were in such a hurry we didn’t, we put them in the compost. Oh, I don’t think I ever Instagrammed it, but I took the dog for a walk and up by the compost windrows there was a field scattered with bones and I realized that’s where the coyotes drag everything they dig out of the windrows. It was kind of amazing. Anyway I have never had venison stock so I’m not sure how it would taste. I bet sort of beef-y. 

If I lived alone I would absolutely make one thing and just eat it all week. But with two of us, it’s worth the effort because we can kind of take turns. 

My sister used to have a brochure at the farmstand every market that was a One Chicken Four Ways concept, but I think she started out assuming you’d cut up the raw chicken, and I just… don’t like cutting up raw chickens. (Neither does she, but her husband has to cut up all the chickens for sale every time we process, so she can usually make him do it. I’ve timed him, he can part out a chicken into market-ready pieces in a minute and a half. If it’s just rough-quartering he can do it in under a minute.) So this is my major variation.

I should get the PDF from her, though; I don’t recall what she’s got in hers, but that was what first got me thinking of this project! I just vastly prefer to roast a whole chicken, and then go from there.

This week I’ve just started off with a venison pot roast though, and I did cut the raw meat into two sections and am starting off by only cooking one, so, we’ll see how it goes.

But a big part of the point is– if you basically adopt one big protein source for the whole week, then it’s a lot easier when shopping to justify splashing out on one grass-fed or locally-raised or free-range or whatever makes your meat more ethical, you know? If you’re eating it all week then it’s not such a blow to pay $25 for a chicken that was raised humanely and processed by non-exploited workers. (I mean. Am I exploited? I work for coffee cake and good times. But at least I get bathroom breaks.)
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January 2024

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