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My poor dude is sick and cranky and unhappy and that is a shame but so am I and it is sad. He has a sinus thing or something, I don’t know, but it makes him snore like a, a thing that snores, and I am just really glad the guest bed in the house is cleared off and made because that means I can sleep in it. I have just inexplicable terrible abdominal cramps and maybe I am dying, but the other upside to this whole thing is that the guest bed upon which I have sought refuge, which is normally covered in laundry, is really Chita’s bed, and she is alternately begrudging and delighted to have company. (She bit me, earlier, but just the teeth-on-skin you-need-to-chill kind of bite. Mostly she is sleeping with her head upside-down, which is like, The Best Thing of all Cat Things.)
I am exiled to the guest bed with the cat and unspecified gastro-intestinal fuckery, and I am trying to wind up the threesome scene so I can get to the Thrilling Action Climax With Bonus Great Character I’m Thrilled To Have Remembered To Include, but this is probably not the kind of mental/physical state in which to write sexual and action climaxes (climaces?) and so on. (I want to like, tease who this great character is, and I also want to be super secretive about it, and I just don’t know which way to go here. I don’t know if anyone but me cares but boy, do I care.)
In other news the Hux And Poe Claustrophobia Oneshot turned into six thousand words and Feelings, thought not slashy ones, well maybe, so I have no fucking clue where to go with that but I’ve written myself into a corner where either there has to be a cliffhanger, I have to kill someone (!), or I have to write a sequel, and I Do Not Have Time for any of it, least of all plumbing the depths of the motivations of genocidal maniacs and how super done with that certain dashing pilot types are.
“So teach me how to steer this bucket. How hard could it be?”
A pain in the ass, it turned out. Hux had no natural aptitude at piloting, which was rather what he’d expected. “I could build you a hyperdrive,” he grumbled, “and probably do a better and faster job of it than I would at flying this fucking thing.”
“If we had the spare parts, I’m sure you could,” Dameron said charitably.
“Are you usually this nice to people you hate?” Hux asked.
“I don’t really– hate?” Dameron said. “It’s not a productive use of emotion.”
“I hate a lot of people,” Hux said. “And things. It tends to increase my productivity overall.”
Dameron shook his head slightly. “It doesn’t motivate me effectively,” he said. “I just fixate and obsess on the thing I hate, and then I don’t have the attention to devote to stuff I’m good at.”
“I haven’t found that at all,” Hux said.
“I like to think about the things I love,” Dameron said. “That really motivates me. If I’m going to die, then it’s going to be protecting something I love.” He let his head loll back to its natural resting place, staring straight forward out the viewport. For some reason, the faint stars and one pathetic planet there made his mouth curl into a little smile.
Hux considered the same view, then looked back over at Dameron. “But you are going to die,” he said.
“Well,” Dameron said. “True.”
Oh lord the whole story is just the press tour from Ex Machina except they’re talking about genocide instead of an AI, and neither of them has stupid facial hair, and they’ve switched personalities. Oh wait no, no dick jokes so far. Surely someone else has written this fic already and can spare me further effort?
Also anon who asked about Star Wars And Bucky, I really want to write a thing about that and it is on my list but my list is long. And I am short. Or. Something. Wait. I lost it. What?
Chita, Chita, help me, what is happening to my intestines. I did not get myself together enough to bring lunch to work today, for the third time this entire calendar year, and I resisted the siren call of Mighty Taco, because Mighty Taco is delicious but gives me Intestinal Regrets approximately one in three times, and I told myself, no, no, these intestines deserve better. And I resisted the call of the open chicken souvlaki from the Greek place at the mall because I also, in my age and decrepitude, cannot digest that much lettuce. Too much lettuce also makes my guts cranky. (Which is, like, Supreme Injustice for those raised as I was on the Rabbit Food Equals Virtue school of nutritional thought. What do you MEAN iceberg lettuce doesn’t count! It is the PARAGON of 1980s American nutrition! How DARE it go through my body like a watery cheesegrater!) So I didn’t. I didn’t do any of those things. I went to Wegmans and bought an assortment of foods, some prepared and some not, and I ate them like a sensible person.
So what is happening to me is not fair. It’s also, to be reasonable, certainly not food poisoning or I would be begging for death, because that’s happened before but not from Wegmans. However. I am feeling very put out. I should have just gotten Mighty Taco because I know that’s over with in an hour or so at most. Next time I’ll know.
