dork

I feel like a dork. I felt really ill last night, tired and run-down, and then Z was making a slow late dinner in the oven and on the grill. So the house was full of food-cooking smell and a bit of smoke. For some reason that made my chest hurt a lot. So I went out and got the air filter I bought from where I work, rolled it into the bedroom, shut the door and turned it on. I figured I needed the placebo effect more than anything.
I came out for dinner, but then went back in, and zonked out shortly thereafter.

I woke with a clear chest, and didn't want to get out of bed. (I was dreaming that we were scrimmaging the Gotham girls. I am such a dork.)

I finally hauled myself up to go to the bathroom and wash my face, brush teeth etc.
My chest started hurting and I started coughing.
So I'm back in my room now, with the air filter still on...

I think there was a false illusion of being well when I first awoke, though, because it's not just the pain in my chest, it's all of me. But the coughing isn't helping. Wahh wahh wahh etc. And it's snowing rather hard out, and I can see that the roads are bad, and I don't want to deal with that. I guess I"m just really ready for winter to be over. It's supposed to get worse and worse, this weather, by the way, so I won't just have to get through it to get *to* work, but also will have to get home in much much more of it.
Thbbbbbbppppttt.
And practice will be cancelled, more than likely. Waaaaahhhh. I just want to roll, man. I just want to roll. Even if my chest hurts too much for me to get a good workout.

Man if I weren't me I would hate me. All the above that I'm saying? These are all things that in someone else I would completely detest hearing about. So I apologize to those reading this, I suppose, and the future me who will look back and be like Jesus, what is your deal?

I also could use an apology from past-me who took a day off on Friday because she felt sick. Sick! She wasn't sick yet! Now I'm sick! Shit, man. I'm'a go back in time and cut a bitch.

wahh-hahh-hahh

Big whiny whiny me. Derby prctice was not cancelled, so I happily went, though I was feeling a bit icky and lung-hurty by then. You know, nothin liek a good workout to help clear lung-crap and chase aches from muscles and have you feeling bttera bout yourelf.
I akated about 45 secons' worth of laps and couldn't keep up with the reasonable pace. I dropped out and ircled the outside of the track for a few laps, then stopped, sucking wind so hard I was growl/wheezing deep in my chest.
Fortunately that was the point whene we had our Albany Espionage review meeting, so I sat quietly in the snackbar and got cold while we talked it over. I agreed, we all agreed we needed to start looking outward, reaching out to the wider community, nationally and internationally. I said I'd take that on as part of my PR stuff, me and Sweets could finish up the WFTDA application, start networking to get some letters of recommendation from toher leagues.

By the end of the meeting, though, I felt pretty achy and feverish. I skated one more lap but couldn't move my legs much. M yfingers and arms are stiff, and m feet won't get warm. Apologies for the typos. I begged Z to make me some tea, which he did, so hurrah for him. I hurt everywhere. And the coughing is really painful now.

Booooo. I wish I hadn't called in Friday. I wasn't sick yet. And I had too much shit to do; since I wans't really sick yet I didn't nap, didn't stave off illness, insted I ran around trying to catch up on shit. I did the non-dishwasherable dishes, figuring I'd get the dishwasher loaded some other time, and I did all the laundry, but the sink is full again-- I never got to the dishwasher, and Somebody Who Also Lives Here hasn't touched a dish in a couple weeks now. So you can't even tell I had the day off, it's not like the house is better than it was. And I'm sick, and now too guilty to take a second sick day for the same illness, so close together.

And it's snowing out there, and I'll have to shovel tomorrow. I told Z I'd need his help if the snow was that deep, and he was really sarcastic about it, so I'm really feeling down about that too. I just feel bad. Boo, I hate all these whiny entries in a row.

Go read my Albany trip recap instead, it's mostly not-whiny.