dragonlady7: self-portrait but it's mostly the DSLR in my hands in the mirror (Default)
[personal profile] dragonlady7
Much discussion this morning: farmsister got a Belgian waffle maker for Christmas. Instructions say to discard the first waffle. "I'm not throwing out a perfectly good waffle," she said, and made a flour and water paste to make that first waffle.
When it was done, she left it sitting on the kitchen counter, intending to take it out to feed to the chickens. (Cue "chickens and waffle" joke, snare snare cymbal.)
Anyway I'm running out of room for a mobile post but over breakfast we had a very entertaining discussion about marketing a "cleaning waffle", with suggestions ranging from the very practical to the wildly spiritual.

(now editing from computer with some of the examples)


So like, maybe you could physically use a waffle to clean things, like dusting knicknacks or scrubbing a toilet, but I immediately went more towards the metaphorical.
"You gotta put in, like, sugar crystals and sage-infused salt or whatever," I said. "Make this waffle and then set it on your kitchen counter to absorb all the bad energies."
"Then feed it to the chickens," someone else finished.
"I was gonna say burn it outside, but like." I shrugged.
"Maybe feed it to the songbirds," BIL suggested. "We don't want to limit our marketing to only people who have chickens."

For the record, though: the chickens wouldn't touch the waffle.
"I left it there for like five minutes," Farmsister said, "while I did all the rest of the chores, and nobody touched it. So I gave it to the pigs instead."

Date: 2019-01-13 03:16 pm (UTC)
j00j: rainbow over east berlin plattenbau apartments (Default)
From: [personal profile] j00j
I assume the pigs ate it?

The cleaning waffle symbolizes that your first attempt will not be perfect and that’s okay!

The cleaning waffle is the waffle gods’ due!

So many possibilities.

Date: 2019-01-13 04:05 pm (UTC)
incognitajones: (Arwen)
From: [personal profile] incognitajones
Waffles for the waffle gods!

And I never knew that chickens were pickier than pigs - I thought they were just as indiscriminate.

Date: 2019-01-13 04:22 pm (UTC)
dine: (huh - katemonkey)
From: [personal profile] dine
hm, interesting that the chickens wouldn't eat it

this immediately brought to mind the period when the bro had a waffle hanging on his bedroom wall for months: someone had forgotten the last one in the wafflemaker until it started smoking. the waffle was basically carbon - coal black and actually quite attractive. there was a little opening on one edge,and once removed from the wafflemaker and cooled, he hung it on a nail on the wall over his bed. it stayed there until he & a friend were acrobating around the room, and someones' flailing limbs smacked into it, smashing it to smithereens. I think it was quite the chore to vacuum up all the bits and dust

Date: 2019-01-15 02:51 pm (UTC)
lazaefair: Cosmo, Kathy and Don from the movie Singin' In The Rain, collapsed on the couch and laughing together. (Default)
From: [personal profile] lazaefair
Bahaha I love this entire comment thread. My first thought was that this is the waffle equivalent of the angel's share for barrel-aged liquor. Or, yeah, in the Bible most of the first five books is taken up with rules and descriptions of various burnt offerings which all boil down to: God smelled the smoke and was pleased. It matters not that the first waffle is a crappy one made of flour and water, what matters is that the *idea* of a waffle wafts into the divine nostrils, which I presume this one did successfully.

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