Sep. 14th, 2017

cut for discussion of intrusive thoughts, fairly mild but, still

Tuesday I eviscerated and finish-plucked chickens. We processed 201 birds. I only eviscerated about 6 or so, but I taught someone how, which means I had to think about it, and I handled knives a lot. (Mostly I pulled pinfeathers out and cut oil glands off tails and ran errands.)

Today I mostly babysat, but I also cooked lunch. Among the things I did was roasting two birds, and chopping up a bunch of vegetables.

I slipped trying to peel a rutabaga with a paring knife and knicked my knuckle. It was minor, and bled briefly.

I keep having intrusive thoughts about cutting fingers off with butcher knives. Because of cutting up a fucking rutabaga and some acorn squash.

What a fucking waste of mental space. I seriously fucking dismembered still-warm animals all day on Tuesday and it was nothing. I cut up meat today! Nothing. Even cutting myself wasn’t what did it. Just cutting fucking rutabagas, and all I could think about was if I stabbed myself or someone with that big heavy butcher knife, or if I cut someone’s, maybe my, finger off. So vividly, too. Ugh. 

It’s using a big knife that does it. Little knives, like the 6″ boning knives we use for slaughter and parts-cutting, don’t affect me much. It’s the big knives. Ugh! My sister has a beautiful big heavy kitchen knife, and I do too, I like using it, it’s the only thing for winter squash and the like. 

At least this wasn’t as long-lasting as the last time I wound up with awful intrusive thoughts about knives after cutting up vegetables! 

I know I get them from using pruners too. Can’t wait for wreath season.

Is this the kind of thing being medicated for depression/anxiety helps with, or do you just sort of have to hope for the best?? 
OK if I had time to be online for more than like five minutes at a stretch, I would go through every single note on this post I made about the Tumblr boycott, and find every single asshole who said any variation  of “but free speech”, and send them an ask about how the White House just called for a journalist to be fired over having stated that Trump, who has refused to sign the measure that went through both legislative houses condemning white supremacy, is a white supremacist. 

That is the definition of a First Amendment violation. That is the government, literally, suppressing free speech, in an extremely direct way. 

I bet you absolutely 0% of the dumbasses that think a hate group’s right to organize and incite violence is protected under the First Amendment would ever, ever stand up for a Black journalist. I bet none of them answer that ask and say “gosh you’re right, is there a petition I can sign?” 

It turns out that if you tear the mask there, the tiniest bit, you see that what those people really want to protect isn’t free speech so much as, wow, you’ll never guess: white supremacy. 
via manuscript: the solution:


“The abbreviations correspond to the standard pattern of words used in the Herbarium Apuleius Platonicus – aq = aqua (water), dq = decoque / decoctio (decoction), con = confundo (mix), ris = radacis / radix (root), s aiij = seminis ana iij (3 grains each), etc. So the herbarium of the Voynich manuscript must therefore be a series of (“simple”) recipe ingredients with the necessary measures.“


All this time.

It was someone writing latin in stenography.

I’m so happy and yet so mad at the same time.
today is potato harvest day

and i mean

all of the potatoes

all of them

under normal circumstances i am not great at potato harvesting but i have this cold in my sinuses so i am expecting i will enjoy bending over and digging even less than i normally do so uh

well, think of me, when you eat potatoes. industrially i think they have a different way of doing it, but for us, there’s a tractor that turns over the rows, and then we get in there with our hands and pull them up and dump them into totes. note to self: find my good thin rubberized-fabric gloves, wherever they went…

because tonight i have to go to a gala and it would be gross to show up with dirt ground into the skin of my hands. 
Potato harvest time! Community members helping. A good harvest this year! (at Laughing Earth)
via replied to your post “today is potato harvest day and i mean all of the potatoes all of them…”

The autumn school holiday in Switzerland is literally ‘potato holiday’ for this reason


I made it through one huge tote before my skin started prickling and I had to get out of the sun, but it was just as well, someone had to pick the Child up from pre-k. 





I tried huitlacoche for the first time the other night. It was considerably better than you might imagine just by looking at it. Huitlacoche is a fungus that grows on maize. It’s a Mexican delicacy of Aztec origin—better known on farms in Iowa or Minnesota as “corn smut.” 

I had it on a huarache (fried masa cake) with cheese and radish. It sort of tastes like the best qualities of corn (sweetness and juicy firmness) mixed with the umami richness of a good black mushroom. I loved it.

Huh! What kind of texture does this have? Juicy firmness, I guess? 

I work with folks who work with mycotoxins in crops so I didn’t consider options such as delicacies from fungi on the same crops.

I know what that fungi feels like cause i farm corn every other year. But like, i never thought that thing is edible.

@tlatollotl I feel you may be interested in this 

I think I’ve had this before. Mine was bluer, though. I had it in Tepotztlan
ooh ooh so! They’re getting a new batch of day-old hens in October, to raise over the winter and put out to pasture in the spring to lay eggs. WHAT DOES THIS MEAN, you ask? Well! I have been waiting more than a year for this.

If I buy FANCY CHICKENS, they would be able to be raised with the commercial egg hen chicks, because they’d grow at the same rate. I couldn’t throw fancy chicks in with the broiler chicks, because they grow at a different rate– but egg chickens and the pretty heritage breeds that grow decorative feathers all grow at close enough to the same rate that they’d be able to be raised together over the winter.

WHAT KIND OF FANCY CHICKENS SHOULD I GET?? I’m shopping just now on Murray McMurray’s site, because they have the biggest selection, and I’m looking at their week of Oct 1st selection.

They have Barred Rocks, Silver Spangled Homborgs, and Silver-Laced Wyandottes, which are all ones I’ve considered. The chickens we have already give red to brown feathers, and there are a couple of barred rocks in the mix but not enough to shed near enough feathers for me to ever do anything cool with them. 

Anyway… I gotta think about that. meanwhile there’s a gala I’m supposed to attend tonight and I’d better go get cleaned up for that… 



October 2017

1 2 3 4 5 6 7
8 9 10 11 12 13 14
15 16 17 18 19 20 21
22 232425262728

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Oct. 23rd, 2017 01:26 pm
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios