Looks interesting. I think I'd try a critique group first-- I'd rather exchange critiques where possible than pay a professional for the privelege. But it's definitely something to consider if things just aren't coming together.

What's most frustrating on my own novel so far is that I just have the persistent feeling that if I just work a little harder I'll 'get' it. And I never quite do, but it's more that I never quite think hard enough, and... well, it kind of hurts my head, and I have to sprint for the bus now. Bah.