May. 30th, 2017

trying to wrap up the last chapter of the epilogue to home out in the wind because that shit is ridiculous.

i made the mistake of going back to reread. just never wrote a letter, not even the whole epic. but.

sweet lord there was a lot in that story. that whole thing. that. people. read that whole thing? 

People read that whole thing.

Christ I feel like everyone who read that whole thing deserves a medal. It was– it was A Lot.

Anyway I’m pleased to note that I think all the loose ends are getting addressed, so at least there’s that.

And yes, I’m pleased to realize that I seem to have put a shitload more thought and effort into my worldbuilding and storycraft than the canon creators. I’m not really surprised by that, though. 

I mean. It holds up, don’t get me wrong. I like rereading it. But holy shit it’s a lot.
gah my queue is empty. how’d that happen??? right i don’t look at the internet very much lately.

Prepare yourselves for me to go back through some of the– shit, my drafts folder is up to 1300 posts… well, prepare for some Outdated Discourse, is all.

Also! Note there’s a separate post of the Strikethru Graphic going around because it’s the 10th anniversary! It’s cool if you don’t dig mine up, I won’t be put out. But happy 10th anniversary of Strikethrough and if you don’t know what that is you can Google it because we’re having the same fucking arguments again now, and it seems that even those who do remember history are doomed to repeat it because life is nothing but a hellscape wheel of suffering in cyclical format. 

iiiiiiiit’s memorial day!

well, there’s four hours left of memorial day in my timezone, I’ve had more alcohol than my bloodstream can ignore (which is like half a pint, I is a lightweight) and this is my third memorial day with Husband, so I’ll say one thing that I’ll probably delete in the morning:

wishing a veteran/current military member a happy memorial day sounds great and everything, but you’re essentially going up to this person who has no doubt lost a friend! because the US at least has been at war continuously since 2002! and before that was the gulf war! and before that was the cold war, with its associated bad times! and then ww2!

people are still being deployed to iraq and/or afghanistan! I don’t remember exactly, see earlier statement about “lightweight” and “half a pint”. but I think there are artillery peeps in syria rn! not to mention whatever tf secret shit we’ve got going on!

or maybe their friend made it back, only to succumb to things like PTSD and depression! that happens all the time! statistically 22 times a day! roughly once an hour!

my point is that there’s literally no generation of US veteran that probably hasn’t lost a friend. so by wishing them a happy memorial day, you’re going up to this person on the day that they’re remembering lost friends and the holes they left behind and going, “Hey, man, I hope you have a great day.”

please don’t. it’s not just a three day weekend.

they feel shitty, because they know this day’s not for them, and it sure as fuck isn’t for the grill sales. but because politeness, they have to pretend to be fine. so just – next year, just don’t.

maybe ask them if they want a beer. they might like that. and then you might get to hear some stories about their friends.

in parting, I’ll leave you with a link to a duffelblog article. duffelblog is like the US military community’s completely unofficial version of The Onion, and it appropriately, consistently kills it:

This Memorial Day, Gold Star Mothers Can Save Up To 60%!

it’s from 2014, and I get the feeling they retweet it every year. the shade is real on this one, my friends. the article is packed full of dark humor, like your favorite vet, so content warning for casual mention of suicidal thoughts, death, dismemberment, and traumatic injuries in general. that said, it’s fuckin’ hilarious.
You know what’s held up the Home in the Wind series finale for so long, of course. I started this back in November, that’s how long I’ve been plodding on this scene. I know it was before December because of what happened in December that necessarily changed the meaning of the scene or at least the emotional impact of it. 

“I don’t look like I used to,” Leia said, still a little self-conscious. Generally her sexual partners were around her own age, and she wasn’t overly self-conscious about age’s ravages, but somehow knowing the last person Kes had been with had been a flawless 30ish-year-old Shara was looming large in Leia’s mind.

“I mean,” Kes said, “that’s a function of linear time, I’m led to believe,” and she laughed and stopped worrying about it, and let him take her trousers off too.
This is how we spent yesterday. #latergram
me: i can't wait for people to read this story!!
brain: you have to finish writing it if you want people to read it
me: now that doesn't sound right



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